With all due respect to the previous critique given... No, strike that. With NO due respect to the previous critique given...
What you were assigned to communicate, based on your board's wishes seems to have been clearly and forthrightly expressed. No overly flowerly language, no undue or harsh criticism, no calling people out unjustly, no "from the top down" pontificating (that's three commas in a sentence without a verb -
). This, meant for a closed group of officials, seems fitting for wider distribution beyond that to associations whose expectations are similar. Now, you know me. I'm about the most stuck-up grammar nazi there is on this Forum. Ending sentences with prepositions, for instance, is something up with which we ought not put. And you and I have privately critiqued each other's work many times, so I'm ready to suggest improvements if/as necessary. However, as to any alleged violations of rules of grammar, I don't detect none for you to give your attention to.
Looks good. Print it.
