a defensive and offensive charged conference question

[shipwreck]

NFHS rules. The rule book says the definition of a charged conference is "when a coach or dugout/bench personnel requests and is granted a time-out to meet with offensive or defensive personnel"

I had a situation yesterday where the ball got fouled back to the backstop. The catcher went back to retrieve it and the head coach game out of the dugout to talk to her before she threw the ball back to the pitcher. I charged her with a defensive conference but by rule think maybe I botched that one since she never requested nor was granted time. How can I justify I made the right ruling?

Another situation was the catcher requested time for me to go talk to her pitcher. Infielders gathered around but no coach came out. Offensive coach came out to talk to his batter. I charged him with a offensive charged conference. I know it wouldn't have been one if the defense had a charged conference going on but it wasn't a charged conference for the defense. I think maybe I biffed that one too. Am I right that I got that one wrong? Dave