You are operating under the delusion that I'm delusional about it being a two-way street.

However, the respect is a two-way street. I respect coaches. I may not like them, and they may not like me. There are teams that I don't like. There are teams that I can barely stand. There are players that I downright loathe. There are games that I work that, upon my arrival, a part of me groans when I see who is playing whom.

However, at the start of each new game, each team has my respect. By that, I mean that I will speak to them respectfully. I will not speak down to them by addressing men as "son" or "boy," or by addressing women as "honey," "sweetie, or darlin'." I will, regardless of any history, give each participant a "fresh start." I will do everything in my power as a human being (flawed as I may be) to not allow any past or current grievances to unduly influence my judgment or rule interpretations.

I am a professional.

I expect and demand the same from the teams. If the participants of the game do not afford me the same respect I give to them, then the game breaks down, and I will do what I can to preserve the integrity of the game. If that means that players or coaches must leave, then so be it.

The bottom line is: if you respect my role in the game, I will extend you the same respect.

You took me way too seriously....
 

I agree completely. I should have put a smiley behind my comment! It was meant as a joke.

Oh, I know you weren't that serious. :)

However, the reality is that we, unfortunately, do have to deal with those idiots who do not extend respect our way. They loathe us, they curse us and they scorn us. We are the "necessary evil" that, if the coaches had their way, would be replaced with robots with high-speed cameras in a heartbeat.

And the coaches would STILL complain that the call was wrong! :D

Here's an example of said machine. ;)

Patent Pending....
 

Obviously the patent holder is not an umpire based on this statement:

Therefore, it is possible to determine if a pitch was a strike or a ball by noting where the ball has impacted upon the ground.

Edited to note: There are other comments that make me believe this individual is not an umpire. The one above was just the first that stood out to me.

Yep
 

Officiating (whatever sport) is the only job you are expected to be 100% correct the first day on the job.

And then improve

And it's for this very reason that we are unlikely to be replaced anytime soon. :D

Until they have to pay for it.