Reading comprehension, more like.

By majority vote of the members of this forum, I am pleased to present you with the following award.

http://eteamz.active.com/softballump...es/trollof.jpg

For $50 I can have an commemorative embroidered patch made for you to proudly display on your umpire shirt. Let me know.

Disgression is always the better part of valor, even in sophomoric execution.

Mr. Pot, there is an easy remedy for that. Feel free to utilize it.

Good bye.

I don't know what disgression is, but from your responses in this thread, it is clear you didn't mean discretion.

Either that, or you are announcing that you are turning over a new leaf.

No, But I will spend more time editing.:)

How Cuuuuuuuuuute, a slow pitch squabble :D

I would like to remind the noob that slapping fists together might cause the slow pitch umpire to spill his beer, thus making this the worst mechanic ever.

WHOO HOO seasons starting then we can have some real fights.

:cool:

You don't tug on Superman's cape,
you don't pi$$ in the wind,
you don't pull the mask off the old Lone Ranger,
and you don't bother trying to tell Jimpiano how to umpire, since he knows more than the collective knowledge of this entire board.

Stop pi$$ing in the wind, please.

And apparently knows more than Merle, Henry, Craig, Kevin, Wild Bill, Larry, Jim, Dave, Jerry, Bernie, Steve...

I have another question, however, about those evals. Jim, what relation were they to you? SRW asked a valid question: is your last name Gilman?:eek:

Wow.

A technique used by thousands of umpires drives this forum nuts.

I feel honored.

Another mechanic used by "thousands" of umpires- well, maybe not "thousands", since I haven't personally observed "thousands" doing it, and doubt that you have either- is to announce the location of the pitch, as in "too high", "outside" or, my favorite, "deep".

Since I've seen a lot of umpires do this, does that make it the right thing to do?

If I decide to start using that mechanic in my games, because I feel that it adds something for the participants, does that make it a proper mechanic?

Is this mechanic any more right or wrong than using a non-standard signal to describe the location of the pitch?

The manual advises against verbally describing the location of a ball outside the strike zone.

It says nothing about a visual signal concerning the ball hitting the plate.

If "the manual says" is a valid guideline, the manual also advises against using unauthorized signals.

Since the "fist pound" is not described in said manual, it is an unauthorized signal.

As I said before, I have used the signal for years along with countless other contemporaries. If you prefer to use the book as your only guide to signals, that is your choice. I find the signal useful in the lower leagues and is univsersally understood.

Happy umpiring.

It is not universally understood, and many teams would wonder what in the H#### you are saying with that signal.

why don't you admit that you would rather just do things, "your way" instead of using the prescribed mechanics,
and admit that you pick and choose what guidelines to use in spite of the Umpire Mechanics section of the rule book?

In other words, why don't you admit that you are a dud?
and that you have no desire to change?
and that you are a troll?

etc
etc
etc

Thanks for the advice, although the ad hominems diminish your credibility in my opinion.

I will make sure that in all ASA sanctioned games to follow the guidelines.