JOKES!!!

[Andy]

A man and an ostrich walk into a bar and grill. They both sit down at a table. The waitress comes over and asks what they would like. The man says "We'll each have a burger and a beer."

The waitress brings the meal, the man and the ostrich eat, and the waitress brings the bill for $10.82. The man reaches into his pocket and brings out exactly $10.82.

This scene repeats itself for several days, every day the man and the ostrich eating the same meal and every day the man producing the exact change to pay for the meal.

The next day, the man and the ostrich arrive and the waitress asks if they will have "the ususal" The man replies, "No, I'm ready for something different today, we'll both have a steak and some red wine." The waitress brings the meal, the man and the ostrich eat, and the waitress brings the bill for $23.12. The man reaches into his pocket and brings out exactly $23.12.

By now the waitress can't stand it anymore. She asks the man "OK, you have come in here every night for several days, always ordering the same thing, except for tonight and always paying for it with exact change. I want to know what's up."

The man tells her, "Several years ago, I was walking along the beach an stumbled over an old oil lamp. After I rubbed it, a genie appeared and told me I had two wishes. My first wish was to be able to reach into my pocket and have exactly enough money to buy whatever I wanted at that time."

The waitress said, "Wow, that is really wise. You can be as rich as you want to be. That is much smarter than wishing for a certain amount of money that might someday run out. By the way, what's the deal with the ostrich?"

"Oh", said the man, "My second wish was for a chick with long legs!"