referee jokes

[jritchie]

A terrible call has been made,
Six players started kicking and punching the Referee.
A spectator said to the other Referee, 'Aren't you going to help?'

The other referee replied 'No, Six should be enough.'

True Storie!!!!!
Rookie wheelchair basketball referee calls traveling 38 times in first quarter!!
Dale Myers, a longtime basketball referee in northern New Jersey, brought a wheelchair basketball game to a virtual standstill on Saturday, calling more than 38 traveling violations in the first quarter before the rules of the wheelchair game were clarified for him. It was the first wheelchair game Myers ever officiated.
The opening quarter of the game between two teams of local paraplegics lasted more than 45 minutes, as Myers whistled players for traveling each time they put the basketball on their lap and wheeled around the court. Myers said he was unaware that there is no dribbling in wheelchair basketball.

[jritchie]

A LITTLE BOY WITH A FLATTENED FROG

A little boy about 10 years old was walking down the sidewalk dragging a "flattened" frog on a string behind him. He walked up to a house of ill repute and knocked on the door.
When the madam answered it, she saw the little boy and asked what he wanted. he said, "I want to have sex with one of the women inside. I have the money, -- and I'm not leaving until I do." The Madam figured, why not, so she told him to come in and pick any of the girls he liked.
He asked, "Do any of the girls have any diseases?"
Of course, the madam said, "No."
He said, "I heard all the men talking about having to get
shots after making it with Amber. THAT'S the girl I want!"
Since the little boy was so adamant and had the money to pay for it, the madam told him to go to the first room on the right. He headed down the hall dragging the squ! ashed frog behind him.
Ten minutes later he came back, still dragging the frog, paid the madam, and headed for the door.
The madam, really curious now, stopped him and asked, "Why
>did you pick the only girl in the place with a disease, instead of one of the others?"
He said, "Well, if you must know, tonight when I get home, my parents are going out to a restaurant to eat, leaving me at home with my baby-sitter. After they leave, my baby-sitter will have sex with me because she just happens to be very fond of little boys.
She will get the disease that I just caught.
When mom and dad get back, dad will take the baby-sitter
home.
On the way, he'll jump the baby-sitter's bones, and he'll
catch the disease. When dad gets home from the baby-sitter's, he and mom will go to bed and have sex, and mom will catch it.
In the morning, after dad goes to work, the mailman will
deliver the mail, have a quickie with mom and catch the disease, -- and HE'S
the S. O. B. who ran over my FROG.

[whistleone]

Originally posted by jritchie
True Storie!!!!!
Rookie wheelchair basketball referee calls traveling 38 times in first quarter!!
Dale Myers, a longtime basketball referee in northern New Jersey, brought a wheelchair basketball game to a virtual standstill on Saturday, calling more than 38 traveling violations in the first quarter before the rules of the wheelchair game were clarified for him. It was the first wheelchair game Myers ever officiated.
The opening quarter of the game between two teams of local paraplegics lasted more than 45 minutes, as Myers whistled players for traveling each time they put the basketball on their lap and wheeled around the court. Myers said he was unaware that there is no dribbling in wheelchair basketball.

I hate to be "that guy" that has to rain on a good joke but there is a dribbling requirement in wheelchair basketball. Players are required to put the ball on the floor after two pushes of the wheel (forward or backward). It's very similar to able-bodied players taking two steps. I will say that 38 traveling violations in one season much less one quarter is extremely rare.

[bob jenkins]

This isn't a joke forum.

We did have a "joke contest" in the general section a while back.