Answer to those way ahead
 

When a player from a team that's comfortly ahead late in the game cries about wanting a flag, I just tell them that if I throw a flag I have to stop the clock, and his team is better served with the clock running.

"You want that clock to keep running, right?"

"Yes sir." is the typical conversation.

Obviously that is not a water tight remark, but it's always worked.

Totally agree!!!!

When we were kids we were allowed to say two things to officials, "yes sir" and "no sir."

Wow, your coach had you on a really short leash. We were also allowed to say, "Thank you, sir."

My hockey officiating friends in Ontario tell me that Bob Dylan is in the house.

Consider this one stolen!

So very true! :p

Thanks for the comments. I was trying to differentiate between the varying arenas in which we find ourselves when officiating, whether it be football, basketball, baseball, wrestling or wherever. This sit. happened on the football field, was towards one end of the field and was loud and somewhat disrespectful. Chances are, it was heard only by the players on the field and maybe the chain crew. If the same question had been asked in the same manner on a basketball floor, I would have whacked him with a technical foul.

Believe me, he got put in his place without needing a flag and I didn't hear from him over the last three minutes of the game in which his team won. If someone politely asks for me to watch for holding, I'll give him the who, what, where, etc to try and deal with it. This was different, I used all the enforcement I needed for that particular moment. It was one of those 'how it was said' moments.

More times than not the coach is usually the one that asks us first to get him a # of any of his players who start to get out of hand. I also think its a good way to open the doors to communication and it lets the coach know that we are there to communicate with them. Those are his players, not mine, so I don't have any right to vocally discipline them. I can flag them, but I'd much rather the coach prevent that if at all possible.

My favorite
 

My favorite is always to say to the head coach: "Coach, No. 54 is getting a little out of hand out there. Do you want to talk to him or would you prefer I just penalize him 15 yards?"

Player gets replaced and gets a butt-chewing on the sideline. 100% of the time. Never fails to solve the problem.

I've got no problem with the concept of involving a coach, or allowing him first crack at disciplining a player who has become lippy, but suggesting officials, "don't have any right to vocally discipline them" goes way too far.

I'm not talking about dressing a player down or lengthy lectures, but the decision what to say, and when to choose a corrective comment over a USC flag is a decision made entirely by the covering official, as he alone decides circumstances dictate.

A player's parents and coach get to decide what constitutes acceptable comments a player makes to them, as the standard as to what is acceptable dialogue directed to an official is set exclusively by that official.

The responsibility for maintaining civility and control of a game rests with officials alone, as do the tactics we decide to employ to accomplish those objectives. Players must respect the authority given to officials as the adult supervisors and monitors of the civility of the game. Especially at the HS level that respect must be maintained as directly and necessary, with as little disruption, as deemed appropriate for each circumstance.

Damn, I should have used that last night. But the lippy players in question were from the other sideline.

I agree. It's important that we don't tell the coach that he needs to or should take the kid out of the game though. If we phrase it like that, and the coach takes the player out then any goof up by his sub will be our fault in the coach's mind because we "made" him make a substitution. Refs who say something like "coach, either you take him out or .... " are handling it wrong.