Situation from Last Night

[ajmc]

When is the bridge burned is a question only you can answer. Most experienced officials realize, and accept, that coaching can be an emotional experience the often produces flashes of over reaction. The key can be in your ability to recognize a flash, as an emotional outburst, ignore "flashes" as much as possible and differentiate between flashes and flames.

However, when a flash smolders and builds into an enduring flame, the only way to deal with it is to extinguish the flame. You might try a simple approach, advising the coach that you've heard his complaint and understand it, so there's no good reason to keep repeating it, and if you're really in an understanding mood, offer a final, "Coach, that's enough", but if the flame continues a flag becomes necessary and appropriate.

When you can satisfy yourself that you've provided ample opportunity for the coach to take a different approach, yet he has decided to continue arguing, he has earned any flag(s) he gets. The fault is NOT yours, it is entirely on him.

After the 1st flag, if you're not the referee walk away. If you are the referee, give the appropriate signal and turn away from the offending coach. Unless he's a complete fool, he will recognize the flag as having sawed off the limb he has chosen to walk out on, and should stop acting like a child. Thankfully, that is most often the case but every now and then a coach will decide to continue his rant. Again, that's not your choice, it's totally his choice and the consequences are clear and severe.

If the second flag is necessary ( that second one you carry, but rarely ever use) throw it without any additional adrenalin or emotion. Once it's thrown, the coach who's earned it is gone. He is no longer a part of the contest you are officiating. All your dealings and discussions should be with either game management or the designated replacement head coach. Any and all conversing with the disqualified coach is a MISTAKE. If he requires instructions on what he must do, or where he must go, give them to game management of his replacement and let them relay the details to the disqualified coach.