Article: "Student-athletes to parents: 'Grow up'"

[jTheUmp]

Saw this in the local paper this morning... not really officiating-related, but we've all seen these types of parents at our games.

Student-athletes to parents: 'Grow up' | StarTribune.com

Actually, these types of parents are one of the main reasons I started officiating instead of coaching... I reasoned that, as an official, after the game was over I wasn't going to have to deal with a particular team's parents again. As a coach, however, I'd be subjected to the annoying parents all season long.

[Bad Zebra]

I know first hand of a state championship caliber baseball coach that recently left coaching all together because in his words "It's not worth putting up with all the crap from the parents". Invariably, it was the lesser talented kids' parents that were the biggest thorn in his side.

Great article...I think it points to a nationwide trend. You can probably take this story and apply it to ANY high school in the country. Sad for the coaches and the student athletes.

[JRutledge]

These are the reasons I never wanted to coach. I saw in Little League how much parents interfered with our team and who played. I always wanted to stay next to the games, and officiating was the best way for me.

Peace

[Adam]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

These are the reasons I never wanted to coach. I saw in Little League how much parents interfered with our team and who played. I always wanted to stay next to the games, and officiating was the best way for me.

Peace

It was definitely a factor for me. I watched the crap my dad put up with from parents when he coached my brothers' Little League teams.

[tref]

Originally Posted by Bad Zebra

Invariably, it was the lesser talented kids' parents that were the biggest thorn in his side.

I always wondered why the least skilled players cry the most, I now see that its instilled into them early & carries over to their wreck careers.

[bainsey]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

These are the reasons I never wanted to coach. I saw in Little League how much parents interfered with our team and who played. I always wanted to stay next to the games, and officiating was the best way for me.

There it is.

I've said it before. People get mad at officials for 5-10 seconds, and move onto the next play, but people hold GRUDGES against coaches. For this reason, I have a higher respect for them since I started wearing stripes.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by bainsey

There it is.

I've said it before. People get mad at officials for 5-10 seconds, and move onto the next play, but people hold GRUDGES against coaches. For this reason, I have a higher respect for them since I started wearing stripes.

I do for some of them. To be honest, I give them the same level of respect I detect from them.

I'm professional, and show them all a minimum level of respect; but the fact is I respect quite a few of them far less than I let on. Others, far more.

Frankly, in my view, character is displayed by (among other ways) how you treat those around you whom everyone else despises. This is why I have absolutely respect for that coach from Duke.

[26 Year Gap]

A guy I know who coaches VG basketball once cut a bunch of seniors much to the amazement of onloookers. When asked about it he said: "This way I only have to deal with one phone call."

If two players are about equal, take the one who took less time to get there. Same holds true in the workplace, for that matter.

[JWP]

Growing up in the early 1970s, our youth baseball program was fairly low key. No coaches, just team captains, with three high school players serving as advisers and umpires.

I remember having a parent yelling at me (captain) from the stands, during a game, because he didn't like the way the lineup was set. I'm 12 years old, trying to play first base, and trying to explain why his son was catching (because he wanted to try it.)

I suspect that because of that incident, I have zero tolerance for parents yelling at players during the game. Never had to have a parent tossed, but I have stopped the game a few times and told them they could cheer for their kids as loud as they wanted, but one more negative word directed at player from either team and the parent was gone.

The last time I did that, during a junior high game featuring a parent yelling at players from both teams, the fans at that end of the stands applauded. Didn't hear a word from the loud-mouthed putz after that.

[BillyMac]

I coached middle school basketball for over twenty-five years. Lack of playing time for one player, and lack of a starting position for another player, both of whom were grandchildren of a former, still influential, town councilman, led to my resignation as coach, something that I had already been contemplating for a few years to concentrate on my officiating. Helicopter parents, parents that hover over their kids, drove me from a job that I used to love.

I don't ever remember my Dad saying anything negative about any of my coaches, at many levels, in a few different sports. I had a few real bad coaches, as well as several pretty good coaches, and my Dad expected me to deal with the coaches on my "own two feet" if I had any complaints, concerns, or questions.

The only way that I will ever coach again, in any sport, is if I'm asked to coach a group of orphans.

My son teaches Sociology at a small private college. He tells me that parents of his students will often call him to complain about their childrens' grades. This is college. What is this world coming to?

[Adam]

Originally Posted by BillyMac

I coached middle school basketball for over twenty-five years. Lack of playing time for one player, and lack of a starting position for another player, both of whom were grandchildren of a former, still influential, town councilman, led to my resignation as coach

My dad was relieved of his (volunteer) coaching duties after a similar incident with a local power broker in our little town who didn't think his son should be playing center field. Dad held his ground, but the next season, without any communication with my dad, they hired a local kid home from college for the summer to coach.

That's what "local politics" means to me.

[just another ref]

I coached my son in baseball for 10 years, the last 5 as a head coach. Looking back, it's amazing how few the problems with parents were. The only big snag I ever hit, which I hadn't thought about recently, was this:

tournament uniforms

Still hard to believe.

[twocentsworth]

here's a thought (and i realize it's ALWAYS different when it happens to you): for those who coach and don't like it when parents complain (for whatever reason)....you do realize that the parents are getting EXACTLY what they want when you quit, right?

By quitting, you're actually reinforcing that poor behavior and helping to teach parents that - complaining/criticizing the coach.....ACTUALLY WORKS.

Unless you directly address the issue with the parents, it WILL continue. Remember, you promote what you permit.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by twocentsworth

here's a thought (and i realize it's ALWAYS different when it happens to you): for those who coach and don't like it when parents complain (for whatever reason)....you do realize that the parents are getting EXACTLY what they want when you quit, right?

By quitting, you're actually reinforcing that poor behavior and helping to teach parents that - complaining/criticizing the coach.....ACTUALLY WORKS.

Unless you directly address the issue with the parents, it WILL continue. Remember, you promote what you permit.

Not always that simple, when a coach works for people who bow to the parents.

[deecee]

Originally Posted by twocentsworth

here's a thought (and i realize it's ALWAYS different when it happens to you): for those who coach and don't like it when parents complain (for whatever reason)....you do realize that the parents are getting EXACTLY what they want when you quit, right?

By quitting, you're actually reinforcing that poor behavior and helping to teach parents that - complaining/criticizing the coach.....ACTUALLY WORKS.

Unless you directly address the issue with the parents, it WILL continue. Remember, you promote what you permit.

If only everything was so black and white, and boy do I wish things were this black and white.