Groan! :D

Dang, I didn't realize there was a contest! So here's my response from another post:

Hey, we don't change light bulbs. But we sure can tell referees how to do it, because we're experts on the subject.

By the way, I heard the grand prize was a Billy Martin memorial scholarship to Mike Tyson's School of Couth.

NBA rules. One, if his karma is really good or if he's got bad karma but the game is on national TV. Two under any other scenario, one to kiss the star player's a** and an assistant to actually get the job done. Note, if it's the Wizzards, no coach has yet learned to change a bulb and they remain in the dark.

NF Rules:
Four coaches get involved.

One to take the T to make a point that the light is out. OKAY, he can't do it 'cause he's either stuck in the box or gone with a second T for continuing to yell that the light is out.

One to yell at the players for not running the "Change the Light" play correctly.

One to yell at his players because the opponents have been shooting the lights out all game.

One to get an opponent's player to "travel" to the light fixture then get on somebody's back to fix it (The opponents have been traveling and going "over the back" all game, so that shouldn't be hard.)

And finally, the team manager quietly to go about the business of getting the light changed.

The coach must first confer with the most knowledgeable man in basketball today, Bill Walton. "Yes, the bulb must be changed. The lighting is hooorrible."

Coaches don't change light bulbs. They just watch the officials take care of it and tell them that they aren't doing it right.

One and he wont need a ladder because the ceillings are so low in the locker room after he gets his second "T"

The answer
 

One, the coach holds the lightbulb still and the world revolves around him.

None, The coach makes up some crazy jumping drill, tells his players it will increase their vertical, and then has the playes do it.

none, the coach will send an assistant to the scores table to correct the problem.....

However many "and one".

:D

Nice!

One...although he breaks the bulb since he insists that the right way to put it in is round end first (all the while screaming "Waddya mean use the other end!? You can't be serious!!!")

Yup, that's my winner so far!

Sorry, this is John McEnroe's method of screwing in a light bulb.

I am serious. And don't call me 'Shirley'!

Here's mine.....
 

.....and, of course, I am not in the contest.

It takes two. One to screw it in, and the other to yell "Screw it both ways".