Amongst the fans

[letemplay]

I'll share my story on the thread subject. After about 12 years of calling hs boys varsity and some community college ball, I sat down as my kids reached hs playing age. I have to say, being in the stands as a parent of a player now was quite eye opening. At first I tried, as others have said here, to explain calls and rules to those friends/parents that sat nearby. After a bit, I gave up and just sometimes sat away from those that knew me and my background. Some folks would like the education, most thought I was only supporting my zebra brethren. They knew I knew all the guys on all the games and their preconceived notions surfaced. I found myself also in a bit of inner turmoil as I watched, just as the other parents would, my own kid perform on the court, and be involved in plays that were decided by guys I knew, mostly guys I considered top quality refs. Occasionally, the team would travel into territory of another officials association such as for regional or state play in games. Funny how my feeling of these crews changed since I didn't know these guys, and I became more of a "fan", occasionally being critical, especially, and I'll readily admit this, when I felt my kid got a bum deal. Only human nature I kept telling myself. When he moved on to play college ball well out of the area, and the few times I was able to watch him in person, I began to notice things that I made mental notes I would do if I ever came back to officiate. I felt I could become a better official, if by no other reason than kinda seeing it from that view. I saw what I perceived in hs and college as phantom calls, calls in the moment just because there looked to be something that needed to be cleaned up. Then I remembered doing the same thing at times and for instance maybe wrongfully calling the third foul first half on some nameless faceless kid on some meaningless (to me) mid season game..wrongful in that I might have been guessing on the play or trying to clean something up. I can assure you that player was not nameless to his parents or coach or their fans. That one foul could have changed the nature of the game for the kid personally and the team. I too had felt this as a Dad in the stands, and I vowed to try to do a better job when I came back, mainly in the area of referring the defense more. Try to be sure that kid has actually done something (by rule of course) to deserve that penalty, not just kinda been in the wrong spot. In discussion with my former comrades in stripes about returning to action, I was always quick to say I thought everybody should take a few years and watch from the stands as a parent as I did. Now this may mean only that I needed improvement, not others, but I did find it quite enlightening from a lot of directions.

[grunewar]

Letemplay - good post!

[Loudwhistle2]

Originally Posted by grunewar

Letemplay - good post!

+1 Letemplay, we've walked similar walks. Interesting how your perspectives and experiences matched some of mine.

[bainsey]

Originally Posted by letemplay

I'll share my story on the thread subject.

I'm glad you did, letemplay. Great perspective.

Here's a "for what it's worth."

A few years ago, I'm working a youth tournament with teams from all over the state. In one game, the coach is a very well respected official from another board.

I'm the T. Right in front of his bench, the point guard made a very strange shuffling move, an easy travel for me. I whistle, and the coach is aghast.

"(Bainsey), what did he do?!?"

I quickly reancted the motion to the best of my ability. (My pivot foot is always the left foot, because I have two of them.) I was a little surprised he didn't see the obvious shuffle.

The following year, this same gentleman is working a tournament game, and he has a similar travel call for foot shuffle in front of a bench. All I could do was burst out laughing!

Okay, it wasn't all I did. I found him after the game and called his attention to that travel call.

"Last year, you busted my hump at a youth tournament for the exact same call!"

He just smiled guiltily.

"You probably called in on my kid, that's why."

[NoFussRef]

I began officiating basketball when I was 14 years old. Not having a driver license until 16, my mother used to haul me around from gym to gym so I could work my games.

She still tells stories of what it was like sitting in the stands listening to parents whine and cry about calls/no-calls.

Her favorite's include the half-time chit-chat where after 2 quarters of complaining about how terrible the refs were... someone would ask "which one on the court is your kid?" to which she would proudly reply "The one with the whistle." Hahahaha.

Or the time she went to switch seats at half, a "lady" asked her if she wanted her seat saved, and mom replies "no thank you, I am tired of hearing what an a$$hole my son is, I will sit elsewhere."

Gotta love Mom.

And yes.... Hot Moms.

[APG]

It's an **cking shame that grown adults felt the need to berate an official who isn't even considered an adult...but nothing surprises me today.

[NoFussRef]

Originally Posted by AllPurposeGamer

It's an **cking shame that grown adults felt the need to berate an official who isn't even considered an adult...but nothing surprises me today.

Back before I learned to just ignore fans, and if anything, laugh at their demonstration of ignorance regarding rules, I used to engage them from time-to-time.

My favorite way to "get even" was to call an "Official's TO" stop the game and embarrass the sh$t out of them. Often this would involve reminding them that they are adults, and we are all here for the kids on the court, and that they need to "SET AN EXAMPLE".

Of course I also offered my whistle to a "lady" once. I figured if she was so sure she could do a better job than my partner and I, she should be given the opportunity... She of course graciously declined and I didn't hear a peep out of her the rest of the game.

[BillyMac]

Originally Posted by NoFussRef

Gotta love Mom. And yes, Hot Moms.

Gross.

I know that they have to be somebody's Mom, just not somebody's Mom that I know.

[APG]

Originally Posted by NoFussRef

I began officiating basketball when I was 14 years old. Not having a driver license until 16, my mother used to haul me around from gym to gym so I could work my games.

She still tells stories of what it was like sitting in the stands listening to parents whine and cry about calls/no-calls.

Her favorite's include the half-time chit-chat where after 2 quarters of complaining about how terrible the refs were... someone would ask "which one on the court is your kid?" to which she would proudly reply "The one with the whistle." Hahahaha.

Or the time she went to switch seats at half, a "lady" asked her if she wanted her seat saved, and mom replies "no thank you, I am tired of hearing what an a$$hole my son is, I will sit elsewhere."

Gotta love Mom.

And yes.... Hot Moms.

Pretty funny. I hope you don't revert to doing those actions now despite what you might read from a certain forum member...especially if you decide to join your state association next year.