Most Hurtful Thing You've Ever Heard From a Coach

[grunewar]

When I first started school ball (read, non-rec), I was doing one of my first HS games for my new association at a local private school. After the game, my P and I were doing our post-game and the V officials were listening and providing feedback.

All of a sudden the door bursts open and the H (losing) Coach comes in and starts berating us - worst officials ever, yada yada. Totally going off. The seasoned V Officials ushered him out.

As a new official at the time I was devastated. Really hurt. Can I do this? Is this the way it's going to be? Do I have what it takes? Why go through this? etc.

I reported it to my Association - the Coach (new young guy in one of his first games) was disciplined and we got an apology from the school AD.

Thankfully, I had a few senior officials help me through it.

That was several years and several hundred games ago......and I stuck it out. But, it hurt and I'm not ashamed to admit it. It was part of my maturing process and is now just another situation for my personal kit-bag.

[JugglingReferee]

Originally Posted by grunewar

When I first started school ball (read, non-rec), I was doing one of my first HS games for my new association at a local private school. After the game, my P and I were doing our post-game and the V officials were listening and providing feedback.

All of a sudden the door bursts open and the H (losing) Coach comes in and starts berating us - worst officials ever, yada yada. Totally going off. The seasoned V Officials ushered him out.

As a new official at the time I was devastated. Really hurt. Can I do this? Is this the way it's going to be? Do I have what it takes? Why go through this? etc.

I reported it to my Association - the Coach (new young guy in one of his first games) was disciplined and we got an apology from the school AD.

Thankfully, I had a few senior officials help me through it.

That was several years and several hundred games ago......and I stuck it out. But, it hurt and I'm not ashamed to admit it. It was part of my maturing process and is now just another situation for my personal kit-bag.

And some day, if not already, you'll/'ve pay/ed it forward, and be the veteran official.

[grunewar]

Originally Posted by JugglingReferee

And some day, if not already, you'll/'ve pay/ed it forward, and be the veteran official.

I do a decent amount of teaching and training of the youth officials here locally. I also like to try to encourage the newer officials in our HS Association. How much good it does, I'm not sure, I'll let others be the judge of that.

I know I still have a ways to go yet to get to where I want to be. I still make that one glaring (to me anyhow) oops every game - a call out of my area, a call not on my line, a quick whistle I need to be more patient on, etc.

But, at the start of my 5th yr, it looks like I pretty much have a VG schedule for the yr, am working with allot of great guys, am pretty confident, and really like what I do.

[JohnDorian37]

Last night I worked two GJV games (just my 2nd and 3rd games ever).

Early in the first game I had made a couple of foul calls against a team and the coach was getting a little worked up. Then there was a double-dribble call (which was the right call and one that the coach couldn't possibly have seen from the other side of the floor--the player, during a dribble, batted the ball with both hands to keep it from a defender). I blew my whistle, we went the other way.

Soon after, during a live ball, she yells out, "Can I talk to you, Mr. Referee," in an extremely condescending way. I was taken aback and got flustered. I ignored it and we didn't really say anything to one another for the rest of the game. But she did get to me, as I was hesitant for the rest of the first half.

It stung--just because that's my worry so early in my career, that I'm just a total joke out there. Can't do any better than my best effort, though.

[biggravy]

I wouldn't really classify things coaches say as "hurtful". Several years back two good teams, I was working my *** off and had a real smart *** coach say the ol' 'you'll neber work here again' comment. I guess it was hurtful because I was hustling my rear end off.

[Adam]

Originally Posted by biggravy

I wouldn't really classify things coaches say as "hurtful". Several years back two good teams, I was working my *** off and had a real smart *** coach say the ol' 'you'll neber work here again' comment. I guess it was hurtful because I was hustling my rear end off.

Would have been the last thing I heard from him, and he would have been on his way to the locker room shortly afterward.

[bradfordwilkins]

One told me I was a bad dancer...

[Rich]

Originally Posted by Snaqwells

Would have been the last thing I heard from him, and he would have been on his way to the locker room shortly afterward.

The coach would certainly (at best) be sitting and watching some free throws.