And that is the attitude that most people should take. But we have sullied the game with how many fouls are called and who is against them, then taking responsibility for learning lessons or being proud of how you perform under adversity of some kind. I do understand that winning is important, but it is not the most important thing. At the end of the year only one team is going to be champion and that means that everyone else has to learn to lose. We have lost site of how to lose with dignity and to take responsibility for your role in that losing. And just because something is important to me, does not mean it is important to you.

I am single and I like a certain kind of woman, does that mean I have to look for attributes that are important to someone else when that is not what I get excited about? The same thing applies to officiating or any sport.

Peace

The one thing I have a real issue with is this: Do these coaches who yell and scream really think I give a flying crap who wins the game?

If they do, well, they're dumber than they act.

Rec Games Church League Games etc.
 

I enjoy the game and working with kids to help them learn the game and to enjoy the game for what it is. At my age I doubt I will ever ref at the HS level. What frustrates me the most at the rec level are refs that have an attitude and don't know the rules and look like slobs. Maybe I take this too seriously. Reffing basketball games has been a tremendous outlet for me to reduce stress and think about the joy and fun in life. After losing my dad, my job, my home(house fire) and diagnosed with Lyme disease, two cars vandalized, one car totaled and my best friend (dog) died, in a span of 5 months, this game has given me an outlet. My dad was an amateur umpire (Little League in New England). He never umped a game without polishing his shoes, putting a tuck in his shirt and presenting a professional appearance. That is the way I approach every game. In two years of reffing, I still study the rules and keep up with the changes. I read everything I can and then role play situations to better prepare myself. I have received some high marks from other senior refs but I still strive to improve each and every game. Some of my brother refs, that are senior to me, still dont know all the rules and don't care. They call a lousy game, don't hustle, no mechanics and no communication. So, when coaches and fans, parents etc, start to get on their case and complain, I can not blame them. They bring it upon themselves and then they get an attitude. I am not immune to making mistakes because I have had my share of missed calls and forgetting a rule(s) as well. Some of these refs should hang it up because they do not do anything for the game nor for the spirit of the game and for good competition and sportsmanship. You know some of them and I am not saying all rec refs are like this but there are quite a few. I always look forward to learning something from a partner and sharing experiences, just like this forum. This is where one can grow and improve and get a great perspective on the game, both the good and the ugly. I have mentioned to my assignor that I prefer not to partner with some, but he likes to give me the troubled ones in hopes that I can help them improve. So when I hear some stories about fans and coaches getting on refs, I reflect back on my dad...and think about myself and how I am representing the game... "Am I prepared (know the rules)...am I mentally alert...did I check my attitude at the door...Am I hear to enjoy the game...is my shirt tucked, pants pressed, shoes shined, hair combed and I always rember to introduce myself to my partner, smile and say "Look forward to working with you, now let's play some basketball."

Thank you, sir, for your post. You are the poster child for what I was trying to say. The attitude you have says that every game you call is important, no matter what anybody else may say. If there was a question posted on this board about a call made in one of your games, and this question was met with "The officials were probably clueless," or "What's the difference, it's just a rec league," this generalization would be doing a disservice to you, which is what I would like to avoid.

Every game does not share the same importance to everyone, nor should it. This is an activity, not a moral display of standards. If the games did have the same level of importance, then TV would cover them and fans outside of parents would be at every game. What you are saying sounds great, but not very realistic. I tend to want to deal with realism than fantasy.

Peace

Nobody said the same level of importance. There is a huge difference between equal importance and "your game/league is silly." A moral display of standards. I have no idea what you mean, but that is not unusual.

A side note about matters of relative importance and what should be on tv:
A topic brought up for discussion on ESPN First Take was whether or not Lebron James should change his number.

Let me put it this way. You said in an earlier conversation that you did not mind showing up to a game in your uniform. I think that kind of display would be unprofessional and where I live would be considered unprofessional by most.

Just those two things illustrate a completely different approach to officiating and how you want to be perceived as compared to how I want to be perceived. If you and I can have a completely different approach to how we look before a game, why do we have to have the same approach to how we perceive a game that we work?

Peace

I, too, want to thank you!
 

I hear you brother!

Man-o-live, that is a traumatic life... let alone in the past 5 months.

Your father taught you right and well - lead by example & if you are going to do the job, do it right the first time.

Feedback from colleagues is important and that is why I participate in this forum.

I hope I am able to look in the mirror and acknowledge to myself that it is over when that time comes.

It is time to look in the mirror and be honest to yourself, if you stop seeking improvement.

You can work with me!!! :)

This just sounds like 2 different point of opinions here. JAR, it is unfair for you to ask people to keep their opinions to themselves on a public forum. I do, however get your point, but the greater issue here I think is that one thing a lot of officials have a hard time with is calling a game to the level of the competition.

In a youth game or middle school game how anal are we with the book being ready 10 minutes before? How often do we get the captains and then meet with coaches? How often do we stand opposite the table and observe the warmups for 15 minutes? How much LESS patience do we have with coaches at these levels rather than the varsity level?

I think that what some posters are taking personally should be taken more as a general guideline of perspective. We do not officiate all levels the same, and judgement skews from one side to the other depending on what level you are officiating. Every game I officiate I take pride in and in most cases I hustle until the very end. There have been occassions where I slacked off, but I was still capable of officiating that game at my slacked off state as if I had been hustling or compared to some other officials who might have to work harder.

And I don't think that anyone looks down on an official for the level he works. We just look down on those levels of play after our own experience has taught us that the participants are a bunch of yahoos.

Okay, I think I get it now. The fact that you wear "nice clothes" to a game raises you to a level of "professionalism" which, coupled with your perceptions of games that you work gives you the right to speak in a condescending tone to others about games that they play and the officials who work them.

Deecee,

Very well said.

Peace

Do not twist what I said. I simply said that my approach is clearly different than your approach. And personally what I wear in certain situations in and outside of officiating is very (extremely) important to me. I would not for example wear jeans to officiating a high school game. This is my way (BTW I am not the only one that feels this way), that is fine with me. I realize everyone is not going to have my approach to what they wear or how pressed their pants are, or how shined their shoes will be. Then again I want to look nice for far more reasons than just professionalism of officiating. I do so because that is how I was raised. And when I am going to do a job of any kind, I want to look appropriate to the event. Looking like I just walked out of bed is not appropriate to me. But you do not see me condemning people for what they do now do you?

Now if that is my approach to what I do and you do not approach it that way, that does not mean we look at this or how "important" a game is no matter how many times you say it. All games clearly are not important to me, because I choose to only work certain levels no matter how much is offered to work those games. I am fine with this, why is it hard for you and others to understand other distinctions people make about what they do when they officiated.

Peace

The point of the keep it yourself part was simply trying to discourage derogatory remarks, which might result in negative publicity that we as a group don't need. As far as different approaches to officiating different levels, I personally find it a relief to call varsity games after calling youth league games. When I was first approached about officiating, it was at the jr. high level. I expressed doubts about my own ability to do the job and was told, "Just keep them from killing each other." This was said jokingly, but the idea is based in fact. The biggest problem I see at low levels is officials who will not blow the whistle. This can be a rookie plagued by uncertainty, but it could just as easily be a certified official daydreaming about D1 and thinking "this game doesn't matter."

I am fine with it and I get it. I don't expect people to all follow the same pattern or my pattern. I respect everyone's opinion because I have learned many moons ago, it's not all about me and I am not always right. There are a lot of great people in this world and I would like to learn and grow from those that God puts beside me to work and live with it. And maybe I take my rec games too seriously like I said, but for now, I get charged up for them, I look forward to getting on the court with the kids and I like the environment and I hope and pray that I bring my best out there for them. I am also getting paid for this and representing my association as well.