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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 12:49am
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How do you keep your head in the game...

When you have a very difficult issue happening off the court...

ex: death in the family.. or divorce.. or whatever...
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Coach.. I dont care if you coached in the ncaa.. this is a 7th grade girls traveling team.
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 12:58am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bearfanmike20
When you have a very difficult issue happening off the court...

ex: death in the family.. or divorce.. or whatever...
If I'm working it's my time to get away from everything else for a few hours. For me, it starts my preparing myself going to the game. Usually if I'm riding along with someone we usually discuss odd plays and how to enforce it by rule. A good pre-game is the most important thing.
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 01:18am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bearfanmike20
When you have a very difficult issue happening off the court...

ex: death in the family.. or divorce.. or whatever...
Working games is the best thing to get my mind off of personal things. Actually it is very easy to stay focused. I my Grandmother died this past football season and I could not wait to get back from out of town to work a game.

Peace
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 07:34am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JRutledge
Working games is the best thing to get my mind off of personal things. Actually it is very easy to stay focused.
I have found this to be the case, as well.
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  #5 (permalink)  
Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 07:48am
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I think it comes from experience. Officiating probably takes more focus, in many ways, than necessary for a regular job. If you feel like you will not be able to focus, or are questioning it at least, you should turn the game in.

I've had situations occur off the court that mentally/emotionally bring me to my knees, BUT I love this game! My goal is to do right by this game every time out and when I feel like I'm not willing to do that I will quit.
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 09:21am
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I agree with what everyone else has said. Some nights it is difficult to leave your day in the car when you arrive at a game. I try to break the game into small chunks of time and tell myself to focus until the next time out, quarter break, etc. Then I step back, take a deep breath and relax during that dead ball period. After that it is back to focus.
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 09:37am
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Back in December of 2000, I was in my first year...It was 2:00 on a Saturday and I was about to toss the ball for tip off when my wife walked in the gym....It was odd that she showed up because she never comes to the games I officiate...She was there to tell me that my dad had suffered a massive heart attack....Obviously I had to leave the gym and the guy I was working with ended up working the game by himself (kids rec league, so not a huge deal). My dad was pronounced dead at 2:34..he was 64 years old....Although we lived 10 minutes from each other...he was 2 hours away near Cincy at a Riverboat and passed away at a hospital down there and I didn't get to see him that day...I had seen him the day before but just "in passing" as I stopped at his house to pick something up and was gone in a flash without much conversation....

Over the course of the next week getting all his funeral arrangements and the funeral itself and thinking I wasted the last chance I had to see him.... I contemplated if I could actually go back on a court to officiate because I was there when I got the news...I ended up taking the next weekend off from doing games....2 weeks later I took the court again with a heavy heart but I knew I had "my partner" with me in spirit and that my dad would have wanted me to keep pressing on. That in itself kept my head where it needed to be.

Although my dad has never seen me officiate a game in person in 7+ seasons, he takes the court with me everytime I step out there. I agree with others that you can "escape" by taking the court...I've really learned how to tune everything outside the court out and focus on the 10 kids on the court and the 2 coaches I have that day...
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 10:09am
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My opinion is that if an individual cannot focus mentally on the basketball game at an appropriate level to provide the service of officiating, then that person needs to either turn back the assignment or not accept in the first place.

That may sound cold, but the kids deserve a quality performance. It's not acceptable to say, my mind wasn't really in it today because of ...X, Y, or Z.
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 10:26am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Coltdoggs
Back in December of 2000, I was in my first year...It was 2:00 on a Saturday and I was about to toss the ball for tip off when my wife walked in the gym....It was odd that she showed up because she never comes to the games I officiate...She was there to tell me that my dad had suffered a massive heart attack....Obviously I had to leave the gym and the guy I was working with ended up working the game by himself (kids rec league, so not a huge deal). My dad was pronounced dead at 2:34..he was 64 years old....Although we lived 10 minutes from each other...he was 2 hours away near Cincy at a Riverboat and passed away at a hospital down there and I didn't get to see him that day...I had seen him the day before but just "in passing" as I stopped at his house to pick something up and was gone in a flash without much conversation....

Over the course of the next week getting all his funeral arrangements and the funeral itself and thinking I wasted the last chance I had to see him.... I contemplated if I could actually go back on a court to officiate because I was there when I got the news...I ended up taking the next weekend off from doing games....2 weeks later I took the court again with a heavy heart but I knew I had "my partner" with me in spirit and that my dad would have wanted me to keep pressing on. That in itself kept my head where it needed to be.

Although my dad has never seen me officiate a game in person in 7+ seasons, he takes the court with me everytime I step out there. I agree with others that you can "escape" by taking the court...I've really learned how to tune everything outside the court out and focus on the 10 kids on the court and the 2 coaches I have that day...

Great input!! This example cited keeps everything in perspective.
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 11:40am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nevadaref
My opinion is that if an individual cannot focus mentally on the basketball game at an appropriate level to provide the service of officiating, then that person needs to either turn back the assignment or not accept in the first place.

That may sound cold, but the kids deserve a quality performance. It's not acceptable to say, my mind wasn't really in it today because of ...X, Y, or Z.
Thats why I'm looking for advice.... I'm going through some stuff, I've done about 4 games now.. and its not that I'm thinking of the other stuff during the game, but... I just feel... slower... My head is in the game, but yet I dont feel on top of my game??...

Does that make sense??....
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I have heard more resumes in the last 3 months then in the first 27 years I've been on this planet.

Coach.. I dont care if you coached in the ncaa.. this is a 7th grade girls traveling team.
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 11:56am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bearfanmike20
Thats why I'm looking for advice.... I'm going through some stuff, I've done about 4 games now.. and its not that I'm thinking of the other stuff during the game, but... I just feel... slower... My head is in the game, but yet I dont feel on top of my game??...

Does that make sense??....
I found that officiating provides me an escape. By focussing on the game and only the game, all my outside concerns go away for a short time. Use it that way.

If your game isn't the first at that venue, show up early and watch the previous game. It'll help you get into "basketball mode." If yours is the first, or if you aren't able to go early due to other issues, find some time the day before to go to a game and watch, focussing only on the game you are watching. It'll help train your mind to focus on the game while you're at the gym.
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 11:59am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bearfanmike20
Thats why I'm looking for advice.... I'm going through some stuff, I've done about 4 games now.. and its not that I'm thinking of the other stuff during the game, but... I just feel... slower... My head is in the game, but yet I dont feel on top of my game??...

Does that make sense??....
Mike...I know what you are saying and I would offer this...

Stop going out drinking the night before you have games!

Ok, seriously...in this time you are struggling...Wake up on the day of your game and begin to prepping for you game the minute you start your day....Think about the game while in the shower...watch some hoops highlights, but not like you were checking out the score...Log in here during the day...start thinking about the game earlier in the day and that will help get you where you need to be mentally by game time...

If that doesn't help, then by all means, take a couple weeks off to get your head right...
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  #13 (permalink)  
Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 12:58pm
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bearfanmike20
When you have a very difficult issue happening off the court...

ex: death in the family.. or divorce.. or whatever...
My best advice is with first-hand experience. Take some time off of officiating. Even as much as 3 weeks - which is like an eternity during the season. Your first game back you will fall in love again, and know that you're home.

Also, if you don't already, take some lower level games.

During those 3 weeks, think about a simpler life and be thankful. Don't forget to deal with why you're taking the break.

When you come back, you will be so much more in love with the game, you'll wonder ho wcan such a thing happen?
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 01:13pm
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JugglingReferee
My best advice is with first-hand experience. Take some time off of officiating. Even as much as 3 weeks - which is like an eternity during the season. Your first game back you will fall in love again, and know that you're home.

Also, if you don't already, take some lower level games.

During those 3 weeks, think about a simpler life and be thankful. Don't forget to deal with why you're taking the break.

When you come back, you will be so much more in love with the game, you'll wonder ho wcan such a thing happen?
I agree...and while you are being thankful, remind yourself you are not a chrippy coach! (Said the ref who coaches his daughter's team )
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Old Thu Feb 28, 2008, 01:37pm
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nevadaref
My opinion is that if an individual cannot focus mentally on the basketball game at an appropriate level to provide the service of officiating, then that person needs to either turn back the assignment or not accept in the first place.

That may sound cold, but the kids deserve a quality performance. It's not acceptable to say, my mind wasn't really in it today because of ...X, Y, or Z.
This site, along with rulings and situation examples also examines the thought process and emotions of officials and acts as a personal catharsis as to one's inner thoughts as they officiate. It's an open forum and I respect posters who share these thoughts not only on rules, but the human element of officiating. Despite your expertise in rules knowledge, you seem void of the latter.
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