How do you keep your head in the game...

[Adam]

Rut, I think Nevada would agree with you. He doesn't seem to be saying that a person should always turn back the games if they have these things going on. He seems to be saying that it should be considered, for an official who can't concentrate on the game due to outside issues.

Everybody deals with life's stresses differently, and some of those stresses are harder than others to deal with and not adjust your life temporarily. I can imagine a death in the family causing me to need to turn back games, depending on how close I was to the person who died. I can imagine a divorce going either way as well, although I think a person would be more likely to be helped by continuing with an officiating schedule through this than through a family death.

[JRutledge]

Originally Posted by Snaqwells

Rut, I think Nevada would agree with you. He doesn't seem to be saying that a person should always turn back the games if they have these things going on. He seems to be saying that it should be considered, for an official who can't concentrate on the game due to outside issues.

My comments have little to do with Nevada. My point is that it is not easy to just "give back" or "get a sub" when these issues come up. And having a death in the family is different than a divorce or a sickness that might be an elongated situation.

Originally Posted by Snaqwells

Everybody deals with life's stresses differently, and some of those stresses are harder than others to deal with and not adjust your life temporarily. I can imagine a death in the family causing me to need to turn back games, depending on how close I was to the person who died. I can imagine a divorce going either way as well, although I think a person would be more likely to be helped by continuing with an officiating schedule through this than through a family death.

If you lose a parent or you lose a child is a different emotion than losing a distant relative you barely know. Having lost my father before I ever officiated, you do not just get over it in a day or two. That is something that you are constantly reminded of and have to deal with on a daily basis even years after something like that happens. And I am sure those that lose children have to deal with issues that I hope to never imagine. And for the suggestion that "you just should give back the game" is not only unrealistic, but silly. I would have no problem if someone one wants to not work the week of a death or a couple days. But at some point people have to go on with their lives and get back to what they were doing before those kinds of things. It does not mean the pain and the issues go away overnight or because you are dealing with those things. And that is why the reaction that fullor had was understood in my opinion.

Peace

[Bearfanmike20]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

My comments have little to do with Nevada. My point is that it is not easy to just "give back" or "get a sub" when these issues come up. And having a death in the family is different than a divorce or a sickness that might be an elongated situation.



If you lose a parent or you lose a child is a different emotion than losing a distant relative you barely know. Having lost my father before I ever officiated, you do not just get over it in a day or two. That is something that you are constantly reminded of and have to deal with on a daily basis even years after something like that happens. And I am sure those that lose children have to deal with issues that I hope to never imagine. And for the suggestion that "you just should give back the game" is not only unrealistic, but silly. I would have no problem if someone one wants to not work the week of a death or a couple days. But at some point people have to go on with their lives and get back to what they were doing before those kinds of things. It does not mean the pain and the issues go away overnight or because you are dealing with those things. And that is why the reaction that fullor had was understood in my opinion.

Peace

Exactly... giving up the games is not an option. Keeping my head in the game is the only solution to my problem.