Never had this one before
 

In working rec games, I take the opportunity to kid around with the players sometimes (OK, all the time). One thing I like to do happens when a player makes the first of a one-in-one and some kid on the lane starts to run down court. As he realizes what happened and comes back, I say to him in front of all the others, "See, one-in-one means that if he makes the first shot, he gets another shot - get it?" I usually get about halfway through the sentence when they laugh kind of sheepishly and the others realize I'm just teasing the kid.

However, yesterday I had an 8th grade boys competitive level game in which I did that and the kid nodded and said, "Oh, I see. Thanks." At first I thought he was trying to tease me back, and I was going to tell him "good job", but then I realized he really didn't know! A few minutes later, during a break, his coach came over and thanked me for explaining it to him He said the kid really didn't know the rule as this was his first season of basketball. I wonder what rock this kid was hiding under up until now because he's about 6'2" and a pretty decent player, especially in the post.

Just Kidding
 

Boys varsity game. Ball goes out of bounds off red. Easy call. I blow the whistle, give the stop clock signal, call "White", point in the proper direction, and point to the designated spot.

Red player shows up for the throw in, so I say to him, "Not you, the other white team". He laughed, thank goodness.

If I see six players from one team out on the floor before I give the ball to the thrower, I'll inform the coach that there is a new rule that only allows five players per team on the floor. I've gotten some good chuckles from that one.

I've been saying that for 20 years. In fact, I have it copyrighted. You'll be hearing from my attorneys, Dewey, Cheatem and Howe. :p

Mark,

A few weeks ago, I was working a girls' varsity game that was over before one team even came off the bus. Final score was 67-31. We walked on the floor, (I was U2), and the radio commentator came over and asked for our names so he could broadcast who was officiating the contest.

My partner, serving as the R for the evening, calmly told the radio commentator our names were Dewey, Cheatem, and Howe. He gave us a puzzled look, wrote down the names, and then asked what our first names were. My partner told him that all he needed to announce were our last names because people listening would know who we were.

As the players are getting ready for the opening tip, the radio broadcaster, and his partner, are sitting in the front row directly behind me. I heard the guy say, "We are getting ready for the opening tip at __________ gymnasium. Tonight's referees are Dewey, Cheatem, and Howe." I turned around and saw his partner laughing. Finally, the partner explained that it was a joke, and cleared up any confusion. When we came out at halftime, my partner gave the broadcaster our real names.

too funny
 

almost like the time when the announcer asked me and my partner for our names.. I told him. A bit later he asked how long we had been officiating...:confused: we told him, not thinking much about it. Before tip off - they announce our names and how long we had been officiating each :eek: :eek: :eek: Lesson learned - lie about it if your in your first 5 years.....

Isn't this why it is called "One and one"? :)

Does this fall under "Mr Annoying Spelling Guy" or "Mr Annoying Grammar Guy"?

Whenever a fan or anyone else asks for my name, I give him my pseudonym, "Skippy Weaselpants".

I once worked with a guy named John Smith. A P.A. announcer asked him his name. He told him. The announcer replied, "What is that - your motel name?" :p

No. He has to get one in to get another shot. :rolleyes:

And now playing...

http://www.davemackey.com/animation/...s/weaslwrk.jpg

When reminding players to tuck their shirts in -- I'll tell them they've "got to look good for the ladies"

Last week, I had a middle school girls game. 3rd quarter, my partner called a foul on 42 black. We line up to shoot the free throw and the buzzer sounds. I go over there and the blacks book shows that 42 has 5 fouls and the coach as already sent in a sub. The head book only shows 42 only having 2 fouls. After we worked it out, 42 is still back in the game, but is a little angry at us. During the 1st shot, I told 42 that we were sorry. Still, she is mad at me. Before the 2nd shot, I told everyone "hey sometimes officials make mistakes too!" The free thrower cracks up laughing alone with everyone on the lane.

and I believe the Johnny Carson's attorneys will be in touch about the law firm LOL....wasn't that the law firm he referred to all the time?? :D

The original reference is to an old Marx Brothers movie - way before Carson. The only thing I share with Johnny is we both suffer from nictophobia. It's the fear of backing into doorknobs.

OUCH!

BTW - Johnny's doctor is Niles Curvey. Rodney Dangerfield's doctor is Vinnie Boombatz.