I understand the point, but the fact is that "in the tank" is not dead. Words do not kill. The have a psychological effect, no question. But it's simply false to say that they kill.

I tend to agree that the second T should be clearly earned. I won't let a coach make it personal or get away with anything but I will try to talk them out of the second. Sometimes all it takes is something along the lines of "Caoch, I don't want to eject you but I will. Now is the time to settle down and get on with the game."

BTW...Words cannot DO anything to anyone. It is only your reaction to them that impacts you. I have had people say some very nasty, hatefilled and cruel things to me...that I will NEVER forget. However, I do not treat those people any differently than I treat anyone else.

To paraphrase Elanor Roosevelt..."Noone can make you feel inferior without your permission."

IMO, they are words...nothing else. How you choose to react to them is your decision. You see, life is all about choices.

Uh oh. You'll soon hear from rainmaker.

On the contrary, what is there to say to someone who doesn't think that words carry weight?

Just do me a favor and wear a yellow headscarf or something so that when I see you coming, I can run the other way. My "life choice" is to interact with people who use words to communicate reality.

And, hey, it's kinda nice to not worry much about whether what I say is gonna hurt you or not. That's your problem, right?

Told ya.

Told ya. [/B][/QUOTE]

Yea, it felt good in the short run. But for a life-plan, I think I'll give this one a pass. There are a number of people in my life that I really don't want to hurt, regardless of whether it's "their fault" or "my fault". If they don't get hurt in the first place, then our relationship is that much healthier. You can keep the "blame the victim" stuff for your marriage and kids. And when you need someone to pay for your nursing home, you'll always have Bush's great new Social Security plan to fall back on.