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Old Mon Dec 20, 2004, 06:46pm
MPLAHE
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I would like to share an experience I had Saturday evening. I want to state first that I am still relatively new (approx 30 games) but have played and coached my whole life ( I am 45) and have a good feel for the game. As a current and past coach, I would also say I tend to let coaches vent more than most because I relate to them (provided they don't get personal).

On Saturday, an official got sick and I was asked to fill in in the evening. I had worked 4 games in the morning and agreed to do 4 more that night. In the last game, a 7th grade tournament championship game, the game was going smoothly, except for one outburst by the coach of the eventual losing team pertaining to our lack of calling 3 seconds on the opponent. During a timeout, I explained to him the rule pertaining to team control and the incident ended. I know many of you have stated on this forum that you have nights where you feel you are having a good game as well as bad. I was definitely tired, yet I felt I did a good job and I always hustle. At the conclusion of the game, two parents from the losing team approached me and started verbally berating me. They made statements like "you are terrible" and "you should never officiate another game in your life." I kept my calm surprisingly and told them that was there opinion and that I did my best. They then both said it wasn't good enough and continued to exhibit hostile behavior. I should mention my 11 year old son was standing next to me. I then walked away and was approached by countless parents who said they were way out of line and felt the game was fairly officiated. Once in the lobby, they came up again and started at which time I said, just get out of my face, I don't want to hear it anymore. I filed a complaint with the league, as they did, but once I got home and had time to reflect on the issue, I became more angry (however, I am glad I managed to maintain my cool there, since I believe I came across as the professional in this). But as I reflected back, I felt the coach should have intervened - he just stood there and listened without any attempt to control them. And my partner should have gotten more involved as well. I have heard all of the horror stories about parents and have seen it from the coaches perspective, but I have never had anyone talk to me the way these two did. And I suspect if we were out in the real world, they would never think of talking to me this way, since physically, I am over 6 ft tall and weigh about 190 and am in good shape and these two looked like they would have had a hard time kicking my sons butt! Anyone else have anything like this happen? Any helpful hints on dealing with this?

thanks

Mike L

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