AGH! STUPID STUPID MISTAKE

[rainmaker]

Originally posted by ace
Has anyone ever done something really stupid on the floor and you just wanna crawl in a whole for the rest of the game!? I did something today that was just like AGH! DUMBO! when I did it. Whats a good way of handling this situation when trying to not let it get to you soo much. Needless to say my butt got ROASTED by my supervisor which afterwords he gave me 10 minutes of praise for a call I made in the next game but still. Its still eating at me and it shouldn't be.

Needless to say I've learned how to handle this situation in the future... Just learned the hard-way.

If I could only tackle handling coaches better...

OH YEAH ... Inadvertant whistles are jump-balls right? (totally different situation)

Ace -- we've all done these, some of us (notice this includes me!) more than some of you others. You are a hard-working, passionate-about-reffing guy who is trying to get better. That puts you head and shoulders above the rest, no matter how many awful mistakes you make. You want to do well, and you will.

What worked for me was to:

a) get back on the bicycle as soon as possible, figuratively speaking, of course. Don't take a break.

b) figure out why it happened. Rummage back through the thought process that led up to the error, and find that nasty little stinker that messed up the whole thing. A distraction? A mis-remembered rule? An emotional reaction to something that happened earlier in the game or earlier in the day?

c) Learn to fake it, till you make it. Find someone who handles this kind of situation (I mean the lead up, not the error!) very well, and copy them. At first, it won't come naturally -- mistakes are what come naturally. But if you get through the process in a fake -- but healthy -- way a few times, doing it right will start to feel natural, and then be natural.

For instance, in an emotional game, who in your association is very, very cool, and projects that onto the players and coaches? Go watch quite a few of those games. Talk to that person, and find out what they are thinking. When you're not working, practice in your head -- how do I maintain self-control? how do I talk to the coach? how do I move? How does my face look? etc. Do it correctly over and over both in and out of a game.

d) Don't shrug it off, exactly, but also, don't take it too much to heart. Remember, you're not as good as your best game, but you're also not as bad as your worst game. The big picture on reffing is that even if you blow the call on the winning shot of the NBA championship game, and ruin your career -- your reffing career is all you've blown. There are no human lives at stake. And in spite of what the coach says, one bad call won't ruin anyone else's career besides your own. If you start to get obsessive about one bad call, you need to do some positive thinking exercises, and learn some forgiveness.

The most important thing to remember is that, if the rainmaker can get past these kinds of situations, anyone can!!

Good luck!