Paternity leave

[Altor]

My mother likes to tell how my sister was born at 3AM and my father was at a contest by 9AM. I don't suggest you do that unless you want to hear about it for the next 40 years.

Oh. And buy her flowers too.

[jTheUmp]

Talk to your wife as soon as possible, get a sense of what she's thinking at this point. Communicate that to you assigner.

Have the conversation again in a month or so. Communicate the results of that conversation to your assigner.

Repeat at regular intervals between now and January.

I lucked out in that my son was born over the summer, so all I did immediately was dropped summer youth baseball from my schedule... no real loss there. But, had it been during the football/basketball season... I would've taken at least the first two weeks off, because I would've been too tired to effectively work a game, if nothing else.

In time since my son's birth, we've basically settled on a 'two games a week' schedule. Which means Friday / Saturday during football season (with the understanding that Sunday is "Mrs. jTheUmp does whatever she wants" day). Basketball season is usually Tuesday/Friday, and baseball season is usually Monday/Wednesday (typically the busiest days of the week for my assigner)..

Oh, and your child's birthday is going to be a blocked date on your officiating calendar for the next 18 years.

[SE Minnestoa Re]

I did a football game the afternoon my daughter was born. (27 years ago) Celebrated with my crew mates after the game and then went back to the hospital.

I think my wife was glad I was gone for a few hours so she could get some rest.

[Mark T. DeNucci, Sr.]

I didn't have this problem. Junior was born at the end of the H.S./college basketball regular season and Andy was born at the end of H.S. baseball/fastpitch softball regular season.

MTD, Sr.

[JeffM]

I didn't start reffing until my kids were older, although I was playing a lot of sports at the time mine were born.

I think it is definitely something you should discuss with your wife. It also depends on who else will be in the house when you are reffing and how long you will be gone. If it is just your wife and baby, then you will probably be missed. If someone else (such as her mother) is also staying with you, then you probably won't be missed as much.

I used to play in a men's rec basketball league and a teammate played the night of child #5's birth and his wife didn't seem to mind. I was considering playing rec softball the day after my oldest child was born, but decided not to when my best friend (other than her) said he would stop by the hospital for a visit. I'm still hearing about it and I didn't even play.

If you do ref, I think you should take the approach that it is a fun break from your 9-to-5 and parenting duties rather than a 2nd job which you will then need a break from.

On a related note, my other advice is to start saving plastic bags now to put the diapers in.

Congratulations!

[Welpe]

When my first was born in January, I took about two weeks off. Then my wife basically forced me to go work some games. It helps also that we support each other in our own pursuits like officiating for me.