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I've been on the other side of the lines and had this happen to me. I had a fan standing directly behind our sidelines yell that's "a terrible 'f-ing' call." Out came the yellow flag. I walked up to the white hat that night, kind of laughing and said, "I don't mind the penalty, in fact we probably deserved that because our fans are idiots, but can you do me a favor and not it against me the rest of the game. I may need to bark later when you do screw something up." We both kind of laughed a little and the rest of the game went off without a hitch.
I've always thought as an official, its hard to police who said what behind you. My guess is that I've had a coach or two say something that warranted a T, but I am positive more times than not its a fan. Because of this, I've tried to lower my antennas slightly when I am not 100% sure who said it.
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"They don't play the game because we show up to officiate it"
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