[greymule]

I hate to fill in for somebody in a league in which the umpires have made only ball/strike and safe/out calls and enforced no rules whatsoever.

The players think the batters can start with their foot behind the back line and then run halfway to the mound and hit the ball. They think the pitcher can start his motion as he is walking toward the rubber and deliver the ball just as he places his foot on it. And, as happened last night, the second-baseman can fail to touch the bag as long as he stands within three feet of it. High pitches? "You're the first guy all year who . . ."

I saw a game not long ago in which one player kept his uniform shirt not only outside his pants, but also fully unbuttoned. When he ran around the bases, he looked like Batman. The hat he had on backwards was a tasteful sartorial complement.