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I think that's a really good goal list. Not too much to worry about; a nice set of changes to make in a single season's worth of work.
1. Agree....within reason. Warn/whack is good so long as it's not perceived that you're out looking for it. Perhaps more importantly, when the coach isn't questioning you (professional or otherwise), look for those opportunities to be human and initiate a quick dialogue from time to time. Maybe a quick joke and smile when you're the T on the first of two free throws. Perhaps saying, "that was a nice play" when you're running by in transition after one of his players does something nifty. As long as you do this on both ends it can really help.
2. Yes....a long as you don't sound like a drill sergeant. Being military myself, I used to do this until a clinician told me loud is good, but more volume and less bark.
3. Yes. The NFHS purists will always try to get you to look like a robot, but if you have a fun "signal swagger" without necessarily employing the circus acts that were common in the late 70s/early 80s, I think it would do well for you.
4. See above.
My two cents. Good luck!
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