[maven]

May I offer a suggestion for dealing with the coach? You can't prevent coaches from being jerks, but sometimes you can help them redirect their steam.

When I go over there and he asks "How is that not intentional?" make sure you know what he saw. As you report his question, he stated that right away, so my first question for coaches ("What did you see, coach?") he has already answered.

At that point, remember that he's concerned not just about winning and getting an advantage, but also with his players' safety. You might consider leading with that: "Coach, we all want to protect the players, but I saw the defender playing the ball and didn't judge the contact to be otherwise excessive."

I think your answer was good, and probably that coach would have awarded the opponent some free throws anyway, but sometimes when you show you share the concern with safety you can defuse the situation. And it can't hurt: who's going to argue with you about the importance of safety?