Quote:
Originally posted by rainmaker
Dealing with Coaches was one of my personal POE's this year. Here are a few things I have learned:
1. Early on, let them know you hear them. Often this is enough. Last year I was trying to brush them off, and it didn't work; they just got more and more worked up. Just a simple "thank you, coach" can help.
2. Early on, let them know what you won't tolerate. As soon as there is anything questionable, give the stop sign. If you want to precede it with, "No more complaining coach" that helps often, nd you can save the formal stop sign for late in the game when tempers are even thinner.
3. Keep a formal list of "Instant T's" in your head. Mine is (1)profanity loud enough to be heard in the second row back, (2)anything that questions my parentage or the parentage of my children, (3) stepping onto the floor to complain (assuming the floor is big enough for the coach to have a choice), and (4)anything that is roiling up the fans or the players. These aren't the only T's I give, but they are non-judgement calls.
4. Try to keep a friendly attitude yourself. Work hard to be polite and warm even when they are hostile and rude. Think of it as "rising above." Think of the ranting and raving as the 4-year-old temper tantrum that you, the parent, are mature and calm enough to manage.
5. The sassy remarks that are so fun to read on this board, usually don't work in real time. Use them very sparingly. On the other hand, sometimes thinking them can help you keep your perspective.
6. When I start feeling that skin-crawling thing that precedes my own temper tantrum, I think to myself, "how am I going to tell this to so-and-so?" The so-and-so is one or the other of the refs who have helped me deal with this issue.
7. When all else fails, remember this timeless wisdom from our own mick, "Get in, get done, get out."
Others will tell you some of these things aren't the best, but it's a little bit individual. These have worked very well for me.
[Edited by rainmaker on Mar 18th, 2003 at 10:53 AM]
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Thank you for sharing this list, Juulie. I think I will print it, laminate it, and make it part of my personal pre-game prep for every game.
I had thought, before the game, about talking with the teams about me working alone. I figured it would help them understand about what I was doing and about why they wouldn't be getting some of the calls they'd expect. But it was only supposed to be for a minute or two until my partner arrived. Then I saw my scheduled partner walk onto another court and begin working a different game. Felt like it was too late then. Fortunately one of the staff guys came and helped out. (I guess I'm not Superman after all
) Perhaps a really good discussion on working single man would be helpful.
Looking back, I let the coach get under my skin and fester. And I let more of my own temper tantrum show than I should have. I regret that part. Oh well, today is a new day, and now I have new tools to help me succeed.
PS. This is officially my 100th post, and I believe that makes me a Senior Member of the group. Funny, I thought I'd feel cooler and more knowledgable once that happened
