The Rule:
Quote:
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Originally Posted by NFHS 10.1.1
ART. 1 . . . When a foul occurs during a live ball, the referee shall, at the end of the down, notify both captains. He shall inform the captain of the offended team regarding the rights of penalty acceptance or declination and shall indicate to him the number of the ensuing down, distance to be gained, and status of the ball for each available choice. The distance penalty for any foul may be declined. If the penalty is declined or if there is a double foul, there is no loss of distance. In case of a double foul, the captains are not consulted since the penalties offset. The captain's choice of options may not be revoked. Decisions involving penalties shall be made before any charged time-out is granted either team.
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Nothing in there that says that the captain is not allowed to consult with the coach; therefore, captain-coach consultation is allowed.
In practice, officials will just automatically accept/decline the penalty in 'obvious' situations (false start, encroachment, DPI/OPI, etc). If there's a non-obvious choice to be made (ie: holding called on a 3rd and 2 where the runner was stopped short of the line to gain at the edge of field goal range), the referee will often look directly to the coach for his choice, in the interests of expediency.