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I wouldn't take it that personal
I don't think they are accusing you of favoritism, just inconsistency that they think is favoring the other team. I can't tell you how many coaches I have talked to outside the heat of the game that feel that bad officiating hosed them. The other team got all of the calls. And even a week later, they sincerely believe it, but they do not believe the officiating team was biased against them. But those officials missed them only one direction, particularly at crucial times.
I can say that I used to think we got hosed a lot, now I see the game a lot better and recognize the reasons we lose (or win) - and they are all about us. But having been there before, I can assure you that I never thought it was an integrity issue, but I always thought that referee incompetence was costing us some games.
It doesn't have to be logical - that's just the way it is when you are competing. You don't want to admit weakness on your own part might lead to failure. When you take another step you realize that failure to examine your own issues will lead to consistently bad results, because you can't fix the externals, only the internals.
Unfortunately, many coaches do not take that extra step, to all participant's detriment.
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