My all time favorite is still this one. When a coach says something absolutely ridiculous to you, the reply is, "Coach, I'd respond to that but I left my English-Gibberish dictionary at home."
Another is "Coach, there are only two people in this entire gym who don't care who wins - my partner & me. We only care about one thing - that at the end of regulation time, one team has at least one point more than the other."
And, there's always the old standby, "Sorry coach, we're not allowed to call it both ways. We can only call it one way - the right way."
OK, one more. "Coach, let's trade places. You come out here and call the game and I'll sit on the bench and act like an idiot."