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I don't mind a vastly more experienced official stepping in to help administer a situation in which two of his less experienced colleagues are stuggling. However, I agree with the OP that the help ought to be confined to keeping people away from them to allow them time and space to make their decisions. The decisions about the facts of the game lie solely with the game officials and they can seek assistance from the table crew for certain things, but whether or not to DQ a player for leaving the bench is not one of those.
I would never tell any of my fellow officials to call such and such or give a certain penalty to a person in a game which I was not working, but merely observing. That's not how it works. Of course, we can certainly speak afterwards about what I saw.
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