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Thanks, folks for all the suggestions. I'm printing out the whole thread and processing it. The humor, the explaining, the listening, the acknowledgement, the agreement, the admission of posssible mistake -- I had already used in the first three quarters, and was pretty well mashed over. And what Crew said about some of the comments being inflammatory instead of helpful had been true, too. I was digging at the bottom of the barrel for tools -- and coming up empty-handed. The worst problem was that the coach had the fans all worked up. He didn't do it overtly, so I couldn't deal with it directly, but it became real obvious by half-time that he was playing to the crowd. And they were appreciating!! With 1.5 minutes left in the game, and the score tied, both coach and asst coach each with a T, and one player just having committed an intentional foul, which I suppose could have been called flagrant it was so rough, the fans were screaming at me about how I was about to lose the game for them, because of all my racial prejudices. I know we aren't supposed to listen to fans, but it got through. Especially since everyone on the bench was also screaming it.
So, at that point, what's left? I probably should have started tossing coaches, but my mentor said later that even that would not have been best. He (mentor) wanted me to walk away, and try to ignore the whole mess, and get the game over with. Have a sentence or two to say if I got stuck in front of the bench. Well, I'm still working on that last part. I've observed a few games where things were getting pretty heated and the ref went and talked to the coach and the game got done, but I don't know what was said. I think that's what Tom wants from me. Believe me, I'll be asking more questions at those games from now on!!!
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