As an AAU coach I can honestly tell you that there are all kinds of coaches, as there are all kinds of officials.
We had a semi-final game where the opposing coach was tossed after (I believe too much) ranting and raving for about the first 8 minutes of a 28 minute game. The coach went out on the floor after the ref. He was tossed, refused to leave, had to be escorted out and then waited in the parking lot for hours (for what reason we still do not know). His girls had his sense of sportsmanship. He contested the game and called my team a "rec" team who had no business playing the caliber of team that he has.
We won, 32-28, but here is the amazing part. After the game the officials told me that he too is an official and they had worked with him in the past. His other 7th grade team (we were playing his 8th grade girls) said they weren't surprised he was tossed as he gets at least one T per game in a tournament.
Other coaches are a joy to coach with and against. Most of the coaches I know aren't wrapped up in their egos so much that they lose sight of the fact that we are supposed to be teaching and helping these kids develop their skills. This coach yelled at the officials to stop telling his girls what they did wrong and just ref the game. The one official called a foul on his big girl under the basket for "clearing" out and swinging her elbows. She clonked one of my girls and they called it. The coach went ballistic. When the ref tried to explain that you can't wildly swing your elbows and hit anything in sight the coach argued that it was legal. According to his fans the refs did not make one call correctly all night, hence that is how we won. We didn't win on skill or scoring, but on bad officiating. Now I know the secret of winning. Imagine, it's been kept a secret from me for the past 7 years!
Anyway, just a perspective from a coach of a girls AAU team.
Coach G-bert.
(ps: We ended up winning the tournament and beating a team that has beat us the past five times we played them. Must have been some bad officiating that won us that game too, but nobody complained about it.

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