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At this level, contact should always be called more tightly. Kids can't "play through", and especially girls this age. They just haven't learned those skills yet. But at any age, if a girl goes for a lay-up, and gets knocked over, that's always gotta be a foul. It comes under the category of "protect the shooter". If the patched ref wasn't new lead, he should have closed hard, and come up with a late whistle.
Then, when the opponent gets the ball and heads back down court, play has got to stop with an injured player on the floor. At this age level, and in the first half, there's no way play should continue.
I don't know abuot called the ref, "Stripes". I don't think I"d like it, but not sure I'd T for it. But you should definitely have said something about the calls at half-time. "Ref, sorry I was disrespectful. Listen, are you going to continue letting them play? If so, we're going to forfeit, because we weren't prepared for this amount of contact." Or, go directly to the site manager, and ask about cracking down.
Mead -- Did your opponent in that game have any complaints? Also, who won?
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