|
BZ,
I hope you don't parent like you critique other officials. Ken came onto the boards and shared a situation that he felt he'd handled improperly. You decided to play armchair judge, jury and executioner in asciribing character-related reasons for his crew's mistake. You could have added something calm and reasoned, while still remaining true to your beliefs about the situation. Maybe something like,
"I've been there. It's tough when you know that you've made a mistake that no one else in the gym is aware of; especially when fixing that mistake has the potential to turn placid waters into a perfect storm. That's where you have to make a decision for yourself. Is doing what's hard but correct (by rule) the right course of action, or do you stay headache-free and live with a mistake that, going unnoticed by others, would not be the end of anybody's world? It's not an easy question. It's a value judgment, to be sure. As for me, I'd rather take my medicine."
As for you, though, that wasn't enough. You had to demonstrate righteous indignation that someone else would take the "low road." My experience with some Alabama football fans and some North Carolina basketball fans has confirmed for me what I had believed through studying the virtues: those who possess them don't talk about them. I've heard fans of the aforementioned programs talk about how much class they have and how little Auburn's and Duke's fans have, respectively. Always makes me want to vomit. Same goes for courage. Those who truly have it don't have need to call others cowardly. There are other ways to get your point across that are both more effective and less obnoxious.
I'm going to make a mistake in my game tonight. I'll no doubt make one tomorrow as well. I dare say the same goes for you. With that in mind, do you want to foster an environment in which officials feel free to admit mistakes and learn from them in hopes of not repeating them, or do you want to help create an environment where people don't feel free to be honest with themselves and others because of fear of mockery and castigation? As for me, I choose the former.
My perception is that you aren't nearly so concerned with helping others improve as you are with helping yourself to feel superior. Submissions that might mitigate against this perception are welcome and encouraged.
I hope you are perfect tonight.
|