[officialtony]

jicecone,
thanks for the well worded and well thought out response.
I would like to think I do not impart a holier than thou attitude at my games. I am usually low key and try not to be the focus of any call or play. I am very good at " not hearing " comments that I know are directed at me by fans, competitors, or coaches - unless profanity is used ( loudly enough that I know others heard it ).
The list I put him on was " if he is abusive or obscene, he is gone " list. Kind of putting him on notice in my mind.
I did fail in something that you stated which I have used in the past. The " what did YOU see coach? " line. I love that approach because it does allow the coach to express himself AND let him know that I care about his opinion and I am willing to hear it. I am disappointed in myself that I didn't use that. Don't know why I didn't. I think shock at seeing him there in a live ball situation.
I was hoping that by telling him that I didn't want to see him or hear from him that he would get the message that if I did see him or hear him, he would be ejected. I probably didn't convey that well if you didn't percieve it either. Those skills need work.
I did ( and usually do ) feel like I was calm and collected when this occured. I didn't yell or finger point or express anything in a violent or " anxious " manner. I actually heard several fans say " what did he say to him? " as the coach walked away, so I don't feel like I embarrased him or ridiculed him in front of anyone - which is never my intent. I left him his dignity and felt like I retained mine.
But your input is invaluable and I appreciate it. You have given me several areas to work on to be sure I project the kind of professionalism all coaches and competitors deserve and expect.

By the way, my partner also expressd some of the same ideas you did. So I know I did not come across the way I wanted to.

Thanks for the input.

[Edited by officialtony on May 6th, 2005 at 10:20 AM]