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I appreciate everyone taking the time to respond to my question. I "lurked" in this forum for a couple of months and then decided to join -- glad that I did because it really helps to have other officials validate/repudiate(?) what you say.
To follow up a bit, in retrospect, I should have tossed him. This was the 2 of 3 games on Saturday for my partner and me and the first game was super. BTW, I also work with the female official and we discussed this further at work yesterday -- she did not hear the remark. I did find out on Sunday that the coach was tossed. I forgot to mention that I also had a T on his bench. His assistant coach made a smart-*** remark (before I T'd the coach). I have very thick skin and it takes a lot for me to give a T. The assistant coach came up to us after the game and apologized for his remark. He told us that he was a HS and D2 official and he knew better and said he was ashamed of what he said. I told him I appreciated the apology. He told me that the coach has a history of being T'd / tossed. I told him that if my child played on that team, either my child or the coach would be gone. It was interesting to watch his players because even though they were a good team, when they made a mistake, they immediately looked at the coach (fear factor?). A couple of the parents commented that the coach was an ***. I also discussed this with the site manager and they said the team would not be invited back. I think this punishes the players, not the coach.
Someone earlier mentioned putting officials on a list. In my association, coaches are allowed to "black list" 2 officials and this only counts for the current year. The listing is done at the start of the season.
Sorry for the long post, but the more I thought about what happened, the more I regretted not tossing the coach. I was angry at him (I know we are not supposesed to be), but I was calm and professional when I T'd him. Thanks for you responses.
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