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Never T a fan or even a group of fans unless it is clear that there is an infraction like a delay of game. An example is back in the early '90s, Florida (NCAA) had some idiot playing for them that was like 7 foot and had spit on some kid at a tennis court who had made a reference to his height. UF was playing somewhere in the SEC, and whoever was home had virtually all their fans bring a tennis ball. When this guy was first called for a foul, everyone threw their ball on the court.
THAT was an obvious T situation. Funny? Yes. Worth it? Definitely. I'm not even sure the coaches would be that upset about it. But it takes those situations. Otherwise, if a fan or group is causing a problem, get the game admin to get them out of there ASAP. DON'T be timid about doing that, but make sure its warranted. Calling you blind isn't warranted. Them being drunk is.
As far as handling coaches, that only comes with experience. If you are young (early 20's) or look that, it will be even tougher. I had this same exact problem when I started. The best thing to do is to follow the rules and keep all conversation with the bench to an absolute minimum. If they ask a question, answer it. If they are arguing, walk away. Administer a technical foul when and if warranted. I didn't light up many coaches, and it took a look to get one from me. But if they charged down the bench, or got on the court, they got a VERY quick one.
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