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This is when I listen
It seems like the vast majority of coaches are fairly excitable types. I generally tune those folks out, responding when its appropriate but giving them no quarter.
If the coach is judicious with his comments/questions, doesn't make a face of disgust at my call, is respectful and measured, I'm more than willing to discuss or explain to him.
I've recently added to my bag the "I may have missed that one coach" comment. I've used it twice so far this season (about 15 games) and both times it's gone over well.
When a coach is coaching his team, not me, I find myself giving them a little more latitude with the box and any genuine concerns they bring to me.
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