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Actually, in NCAA, you must grant it as well:
From the NCAA rulebook, Rule 3-6-e:
e. When asked by a coach or player, the plate umpire must seek a decision from the appropriate base umpire regarding the checked swing. Such appeal ONLY may be made when the plate umpire has called the pitch a ball.
What part of "coach or player" and "must" is misunderstood?
To your "credit", there is no similar rule in the FED book. But the FED ump that does not ask has far greater game management problems.
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