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I do not want to sound too mean here...
I have officiated a long time. A lot with young partners, alot with old ones, and alot my age. I have a 21 year old son who has officiated, he officiated long before he ever joined the Army and long before he ever went to some forsaken place known as Afghanistan. I have seen him in action, I have seen his how he interacts. I have never been to one of your basketball games so I have never seen you, but you think you handled the situation well and within the rules... My question is what did your partners think? not what you thought. You may have a perception of yourself but others see you in a different light
Generally (I have 20 plus years work experience in state, private, law, and military settings) a person like you describe does not have great experience, background, maturity, or communication skills. The coaches know that you are no different than their players or their own kids...
Here is a key insight to what you said... "looking back on all the altercations..."
I will whack a coach or a player almost as fast as anyone if they cross the line, but I dont have altercations. 8th grade coaches are the worst particularly volunteers away from school. Have I argued with them?yep! Have I told them off? yep! Have I told a few to sit down and shut up? yep! but over the past few years I have learned that skill and as a old Kenny Rogers song goes... I know when to hold em, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, and know when to run. I never count the money while sitting at the table...
I
A third year official barely understands the game let alone knows the nuances of the game enough to understand many times what a coach wants or needs, when to talk to him, when to shut up, or when to whack him...
-if you had marginal situations that you did not seek a senior officials' advice...
-if you acted rashly, quickly...
-if you should have backed off but did not...
-if you were always right...
-if you argued rules with a senior official (particularly if you were wrong)
-if you argued with a coach and told him he was wrong.
it make be a maturity, judgement, people skills type of thing...
Go find a n offical in your association who has seen you work that you trust who also is in the know about rumors perceptions, etc. THEN ASK, but you must be ready for what he/she will tell you. LISTEN Only, no yes, buts... no justifications, no let me explain my sides just listen and say thanks. Then analyze what he or she said, do it a couple of times you'll get a better perspective than thinking you did a good job.
The introspective look is tough and it may not be what you really want to hear, but you will really want to hear it if you are to succeed
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