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Old Thu Jan 22, 2004, 10:36am
Hawks Coach Hawks Coach is offline
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Re: There are a lot of things I do not say.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by JRutledge
Quote:
And I have never had a problem with making my point and getting them to shut up. I do not care what they think, I think a lot of things and never say them.
This speaks volumes - it seems this is all about you. I am recommending a less egocentric approach. You seem to believe that it is important that you make a point. I think you need not lower yourself to making points. It is in the nature of coaching to try to make points. We should make points to players rather than refs, but many obviously do not make this distinction. and we all find a need from time to time, as partisans in a contest, to make points.

Refs are not there to be partisan members of a discussion. Your comments are about defending your honor, which makes you a less than neutral member of this conversation. This distinction that I am making either escapes you or you find to be irrelevant. We will obviously disagree on this.

And by the way, if you don't always say everything that you think, then exercise that discretion in this case and don't tell them that you think they suggested you were cheating. that is perfectly in line with how you say you live your life.

Quote:
But do not try to suggest (because it is more about who hears you as well) the foul count is a result of something else. That is what that comment does. And yes, I will address it.
The first part of this indicates a concern with your image. Again, the primary listeners are the home crowd and the participants. I don't think the home crowd thinks you are homering them, and I don't think you can change an opinion of the coaches and players on the visiting team if they believe they are getting homered. But usually, nobody thinks you are cheating, they think you are missing things. And usually they have been telling you about that all along and your calls haven't changed, with the result that they now percieve the foul count to be a factor of all the calls you screwed up.

Go ahead and raise the issue of cheating. But do not fail to understand that this is an issue that you have constructed in your mind and you are now constructing in the mind of everyone who hears your comment. And if they didn't think that you were cheating when they made the comment, your response may sound to the listener like maybe they should have considered this possibility. The listener may simply think that the only reason you mentioned cheating when they never did is that cheating is actually occurring. That's the final risk you take in steering the conversation into places that it has on;ly previously been in your mind.
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