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With regards to USA and NFHS, the only difference I'm aware of is the one you mentioned regarding pitcher's possession. In USA, the pitcher possesses the ball when she has it in her hand or in her glove. She won't be in possession if she places the ball between her legs, under her arm, etc. NFHS still considers this possession.
I can't speak for USSSA since I don't umpire for that organization.
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"Let's face it. Umpiring is not an easy or happy way to make a living. In the abuse they suffer, and the pay they get for it, you see an imbalance that can only be explained by their need to stay close to a game they can't resist." -- Bob Uecker
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