This has to be said.....

JRutledge · #1 (**permalink**) Fri Jan 13, 2012, 01:28pm

There is a long-time poster that just lost his dad and I want to first publicly give my support to that individual who I respect a lot and love to hear from on this site (he knows who he is) as I did for him on Facebook. I know what it is like to lose a father and it is not easy, but it gets easier but the memories never fade. My prayers go out to your family in this tough time and I am sure he will be missed by you as well as the lives he touched in his works.

I also had two brothers that are friends of mine who lost their mother. One was a three time state final official and the other will probably get there this year. After working in a tournament on December 30th, the older brother with many friends went out to eat and had a wonderful time. This person got to meet my mother who loves to come to many of my games during this time of year, the next night his mother died suddenly.

A day later I lost one of my biggest mentors or fans as he died on New Year's Eve. Then on Monday many in Chicago area lost a big time assignor that helped many of us get our first varsity games and he gave me one of my biggest games at the very beginning when I moved to the Chicago area.

I had to attend two funerals, both exactly a week apart on the first Thursdays of the year for people that meant a lot to me and many other officials across the state of Illinois if you knew them.

My point is this officiating thing is wonderful and I love every minute I spend doing it. But the relationships mean more and as we get all excited about the games and the situations and calls, put in perspective that our families and friends mean more. I will forget the games, but I will not forget the people I have come in contact with that make this fun overall.

God Bless to all and have a great rest of the season. That is all.

Peace

jTheUmp · #2 (**permalink**) Fri Jan 13, 2012, 02:00pm

Well said.

One of my association's clinicians, who also has helped develop and run the state-sponsored training clinics, put it something like this in his speech at this season's clinic:

Quote:

You need to figure out where officiating is on your list of priorities. And it better not be #1 on the list. Faith and Family are #1 and #2 in some order. Your day job. Your health. Your emotional well-being. Your friends. All of these things need to be higher on the list then officiating. Somewhere, below those things, and probably a few more things, should be your officiating career.

Loudwhistle2 · #3 (**permalink**) Fri Jan 13, 2012, 02:02pm

Jeff,
Sorry to hear about your losses! I generally ref with the same group of guys and one female. We have the bond of enduring tough games to ref and we do a great job of watching the other person's arse on the court. Only fellow refs can understand our pain and suffering from foolish fans and coaches.

Good luck with the rest of your season!

dsqrddgd909 · #4 (**permalink**) Fri Jan 13, 2012, 02:12pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by JRutledge

My point is this officiating thing is wonderful and I love every minute I spend doing it. But the relationships mean more and as we get all excited about the games and the situations and calls, put in perspective that our families and friends mean more. I will forget the games, but I will not forget the people I have come in contact with that make this fun overall.

God Bless to all and have a great rest of the season. That is all.

Peace

Jeff,

Very well said. I am sorry for your losses.

Welpe · #5 (**permalink**) Fri Jan 13, 2012, 02:18pm

Jeff, well said and quite eloquently written.

My prayers go up for our fellow forum member. I lost my father in the fall of 2008. It's indescribable. Your family and friends and I believe God will see you through.

God bless,

Monty

Mark Padgett · #6 (**permalink**) Fri Jan 13, 2012, 02:58pm

Jeff, sorry to hear this. My prayers are with you and your friends and, of course, to our fellow forum member.

bob jenkins · #7 (**permalink**) Fri Jan 13, 2012, 05:57pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by JRutledge

There is a long-time poster that just lost his dad and I want to first publicly give my support to that individual who I respect a lot and love to hear from on this site (he knows who he is) as I did for him on Facebook.

My deepest condolences to whoever you are.

Raymond · #8 (**permalink**) Fri Jan 13, 2012, 07:48pm

I'll just say that this person had a major milestone in his career this season. I am happy that he made this accomplishment while his father was still alive.

refiator · #9 (**permalink**) Fri Jan 13, 2012, 11:06pm

Well said. Losing a dad (or anyone) is tough.
This is a tight community. We all sympathize.
Sorry for your loss.

JRutledge · #10 (**permalink**) Sat Jan 14, 2012, 02:32am

Quote:

Originally Posted by BadNewsRef

I'll just say that this person had a major milestone in his career this season. I am happy that he made this accomplishment while his father was still alive.

+1

Absolutely!!!

Peace

Rob1968 · #11 (**permalink**) Sat Jan 14, 2012, 10:35am

Deepest thoughts and prayers to those who have suffered such losses. Two years ago, my mother died, mid-December.
May you look forward to another pair of arms to greet you, when your call comes from the Lord.

ref3808 · #12 (**permalink**) Sat Jan 14, 2012, 11:12am

My parents are both in their late 80's and are at the point where their health is beginning to more rapidly decline. I can't complain, I've had them both for much longer than many of my friends. I'm apprehensive about what the next few years might bring.

Officiating lets me focus on something that I love doing for a couple of hours and it's a good outlet. And I really enjoy the bond with other officials.

My sympathies and prayers are offered for those who have suffered losses.

Jeff, that was so well stated ... nicely done.

Adam · #13 (**permalink**) Sat Jan 14, 2012, 11:44am

Well said, Jeff.