Originally Posted by Mark T. DeNucci, Sr. (Post 676026)

Rut:

It is obvious that you didn't have an Italian for a father, :D.

MTD, Sr.


P.S. My father passed ten years ago, and I bet our fathers are watching us from upstairs.

Originally Posted by jeffpea (Post 676040)

my two cents worth...after you talked to the kid the first time about entering the game, a simple comment to the coach like: "coach - can you help me w/ #12? he simply runs into the game before he's called. i've talked w/ him about it, but i'm not sure he gets it. thanks!"

when you tell the coach each time you have to warn a player about something important, it gives you 3 big benefits: 1) you get the coach to help you stop whatever the issue is (you're working together); 2) the coach sees you warning his players rather than whacking 'em right away; and 3) you're communicating w/ the coach (which they always like) in a non-argumentative/confrontational way

now, when you have to penalize the next time, the coach already knows this is an issue and probably won't be surprised when you assess the T. his frustration will be directed at the player ("not only did the ref tell you about that, but I did too!").

just a thought...

Originally Posted by Snaqwells (Post 676044)

I'm all for doing this, but I'm not going to let a coach think the warning is required. Any level above this, and there's not going to be a warning at all, even to the player.

In all honesty, my response to the coach when he complained that I hadn't warned him would have been, "Coach, the warning to your player was a courtesy not required by rule."

Originally Posted by JRutledge (Post 676046)

I personally think we do way too much talking to coaches about things we do not have to.

Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee (Post 676089)

Agree. And coaches are talking to us about things that they don't have to also. And most of those comments don't deserve a response.

If it's a direct question, fine. If it's a comment, there's no need for an explanation. They weren't really looking for one anyway. They're just planting a seed.

Originally Posted by JRutledge (Post 676046)

I am not a fan of going to coaches and telling them things they can see. If I am talking to one of their players they should have some idea that their kid is under some kind of notice.

Originally Posted by bainsey (Post 676121)

I certainly agree, but that's assuming the coach sees us talking to the kid. His attention could very well be elsewhere.

Originally Posted by bainsey (Post 676121)

I had a coach suggest jeffpea's approach to me one time, after a freshmen boys game where I had three plane violations (two on one team, one on the other). I was a bit amazed that he even made an issue of that (these were high school players, after all), since there are middle schoolers out there that know not to break the plane! Still, I listened to his feedback, and kept it in the back of my mind. That coach still hired me for another freshman scrimmage, anyway.

I used the "Coach, can you help me out?" approach once after that, but it was regarding an assistant coach issue, not a player. That assistant -- who seemed a bit more domineering than the head -- insisted on standing a few times to give instructions. I don't recall seeing him on his feet after I spoke with the head.

Originally Posted by Tio (Post 676188)

I like what Jeff Pea said, to add to it I find that when you engage the kid and explain that you need his help. Most of the time, the kids are just excited to be heading into the game and dont' realize what they are doing.

If you clearly have a bad citizen who is intentionally defying you....

Try this... Don't let the kid come into the game at the given deadball. I promise, he will properly report the next time.

Originally Posted by jeffpea (Post 676040)

my two cents worth...after you talked to the kid the first time about entering the game, a simple comment to the coach like: "coach - can you help me w/ #12? he simply runs into the game before he's called. i've talked w/ him about it, but i'm not sure he gets it. thanks!"

when you tell the coach each time you have to warn a player about something important, it gives you 3 big benefits: 1) you get the coach to help you stop whatever the issue is (you're working together); 2) the coach sees you warning his players rather than whacking 'em right away; and 3) you're communicating w/ the coach (which they always like) in a non-argumentative/confrontational way

now, when you have to penalize the next time, the coach already knows this is an issue and probably won't be surprised when you assess the T. his frustration will be directed at the player ("not only did the ref tell you about that, but I did too!").

just a thought...

Originally Posted by JRutledge (Post 676046)

I am not a fan of going to coaches and telling them things they can see. If I am talking to one of their players they should have some idea that their kid is under some kind of notice.

I personally think we do way too much talking to coaches about things we do not have to. I do not have to explain anything; we do that out of courtesy. If a player violates the rule, it is up to use to enforce it or find another way. Coaches should know the rules so they are not surprised when they are penalized.

Peace