After a good block gets called a foul:

"You better let the ball shoot the free throws, cause that's the only thing that got fouled!"

A few times after a clean block when a coach is screaming for a foul, if the ball was blocked OOB so the clock is stopped, I've taken the ball and put in on the FT line and yelled at it to shoot itself. It's even funnier if you start a 10 second count.

Here's two for ya.

Why shouldn't a referee take Viagra before a game?
Because then he looks like he's always calling an offensive foul.

And....don't forget the first rule of officiating - tuck your whistle in your shirt before you take a leak.

When I played...our player went out for a break away lay-up, he got hit hard, it was on the line of being an intentional but was not called one, our coach yelled to the ref:

Coach: "The wrestling coach wants two points"

Then a fan of the opposite team yells down at him:

Fan: "Get a life coach"

To witch he turns around to the fan and he replied:

Coach: "I got one thank you"

It was hilarious, probably better if you knew the coach and situation.

Its hard to blow the whistle when you suck.

I had a fan yell out to a partner of mine... "Does your wife know you are out here screwing us tonight????" All I could do was laugh.

"No - but your wife does. She's out in my van."

That depends on what the meaning of "it" is.