Put me out of my misery...

[lmeadski]

I am in my third year, ref a butt load of games a year, and have yet had to issue a T. And, our assignors are very laid back and exceptionally supportive of the refs (one still refs, the other is retired, some of you may know her: Barb Beckett). Anyway, my heart goes out to you guys. I look forward to all the games I ref, I enjoy almost all the coaches, and more than that, the players. Being a ref is great. I hope you all find yourself a similar sitch.

[Dan_ref]

Everybody has their trigger point for T's. I would never criticize another official for giving a T. I might for not giving a T. That said... maybe you work for a supervisor that would prefer not to have to deal with T's. At the most he should have spoken to you in private, not in front of fellow officials. To chase after the coach in public is the kind of weak @ss kissing behavior you probably don't need from an assignor. Find another league to work if you can.

Some believe that 'better' officials throw fewer T's and if you limit the number of T's you give you'll be a better official. To me, this is like saying better officials call fewer travels and if you want to be a better official just call fewer walks. Silly argument IMO.

[gordon30307]

Originally Posted by NM_Ref

This is a post from my blog...you can see the link in my sig, but I thought I'd post it here as well.

**********************************
It took 37 games to hit the brick wall. 37 games to have that one situation...that one realization...that maybe...just maybe...I shouldn't be here.

Do I really feel that way? After 4 or 5 hours of thinking, no. But at halftime of the 37th game, I felt that way. I was ready to walk out. I was SO angry.

I did two games tonight, girls C/JV. I'll post more about that in another post.

2nd quarter of JV game. I'm lead in front of B's bench. I blow my whistle and signal foul. As I'm walking towards the table, I hear the the players on B's bench chirping. They are saying things like "That wasn't a foul!" "Come on ref." And things like that. No big deal. I go to the coach and say, "Coach, please warn your players about arguing and questioning all calls from the bench," and continue on to report my foul. Coach takes a couple steps and in a very sarcastic tone says, "Well then you need to call right."

I issue a technical to the coach. I gave him a very legitimate warning to give to his players and responded with a sarcastic remark. I wasn't going to take that. Partner give the coach the seatbelt and I move away from it all.

About 10 seconds into the second half, I'm lead again. This time in front of A's bench. I blow my whistle again to signal a foul. I look up at the clock furthest away from me to make sure it's stopped. As I glance over I notice the B's coach up off the bench about 5 feet away from his chair onto the court. As I'm going to report, I tell coach, "You need to remain seated." He sticks his hand out, giving me the stop sign and continues talking to his players. I need to point out that he was NOT reacting a play and was out on the floor COACHING his players. I give him his second T and tell him he has been ejected.

After I report all the fouls I stand in front of the table waiting for the coach to leave. What I didn't mention is that 3 veteran officails (one of which is our regional assignor) are sitting in the stands behind B's bench waiting for their Varsity game. They were sitting about 5 rows up...which is pretty far behind the bench. I notice that as the coach leaves, our regional assignor gets up and follows him out. I was pissed from that point.

We finish the half without incident and head to the locker room. I go in and sit down and begin discussing what we need to work on with my partner in the second half when he walks in. He makes a beeline towards me and starts talking.

He wants to know what the coach said to warrant the first T. I told him and he says, "No. Thats no what he said." I asked him how he knew that and he said that he was sitting behind the bench an heard. I lost it. I replied, "Thats bulls$%^, there is no way you could have heard him from way up there." I told him about the tone the coach said it in and the inflection. He told me that I need to lend an ear when a coach needs to vent. I agreed, but not in this situation. I told him that I gave the coach a legitimate warning to his bench and he responded with sarcasm so I wouldn't "lend an ear" to that. The other "veteran" even told me that in his opinion I was "glorifying" myself with my whistle. This coming from a guy that told of a story of him T'ing a coach when the coach raised his hands in the air questioning a call. "Take control of the game," he said. Yeah right.

He then told me that the second Technical was also unwarranted because I let the Home coach on the court also. He was right. I don't have a problem with a coach walking onto the court a foot or two to talk to their players...as long as they are out of the way. I know of a few refs...including the man giving me the lecture, and I told him that. I also told him that before the Technical, I was letting the Visiting coach have the same leeway as the Home coach.

I then told him that I wanted to know what he told the coach. I was very upset and lost my cool. I told him that if he told the coach the same things he told me that he sold me out and I wouldn't stand for that. He told me he just went to the coach so that he could vent...nothing more. I don't really have a choice but to believe him...so I left it at that.

I was livid...I was angry...I wanted to walk out right there. I felt thrown under the bus. I didn't feel that I was being helped in this situation. I just felt as if I was being signaled out...in front of my partner and the other referees for my actions. It made me wonder if I really wanted to continue doing what I love to do.

But I'm better than that. I know I lost it and after my game I apologized for losing it like that but still re-iterated that I felt I was justified in EVERY ASPECT of the situation.

Now it's time to write up the game report.
******************************

When the Coach is standing after I issue the Tee I would ask my partner to remind him he needs to sit. Perhaps the second tee and ejection MAY have been avoided if you handled it this way. Generaaly speaking you should avoid if possible issuing the second tee. However if warranted by all means tee and eject.

Concerning your assignor rather than getting in a p**sing contest ask him how he would have handled it. You don't have to agree with him but perhaps you might pick up something you can use.

Good Luck

[Jurassic Referee]

Originally Posted by gordon30307

When the Coach is standing after I issue the Tee I would ask my partner to remind him he needs to sit. Perhaps the second tee and ejection MAY have been avoided if you handled it this way.

If you re-read his post, Gordon, he stated "Partner gave the coach the seatbelt...."

[Bearfanmike20]

I still have yet to call a T in 35+ games now.

[gordon30307]

Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee

If you re-read his post, Gordon, he stated "Partner gave the coach the seatbelt...."

Than you gotta do what you gotta do.

[Junker]

I'm not going to comment on the T situations, I wasn't there, I didn't see. What I am going to comment on is your discussion with the assignor. You have to realize, for better or worse, this is a person higher up the food chain than you. As with going to camps, you don't want to get the reputation of someone that doesn't listen to get better. I don't agree with how your assignor handled the situation, but you don't want to go burning bridges in your first year. I'd reccomend finding a time to sit down and replay the situation with your assignor and listen to their take on how it could have been handled. If you do this, don't be the "yes, but" guy.

[Back In The Saddle]

Originally Posted by Bearfanmike20

I still have yet to call a T in 35+ games now.

Yeah? And...? So...? What are you trying to say? You've been lucky? Your game management skills are absolutely top-notch? You're a coach? You have rhino-thick skin? Or are you just stirring the pot?

[NM_Ref]

lol...want to hear something funny? My assignor...the one that gave me the lecture ended up throwing out the home coach. And talking to people at the game, they did it cause he "talked to much." I can't get enough of it...funny stuff...

[MadCityRef]

Originally Posted by NM_Ref

I agree with that completely. I should note that a lot of those T's are delay of game tech's and administrative technicals. Coaches forgetting to enter names in books, etc. I tend to get a lot of lower level games both in playing ability and coaching. I know it's because I'm new. I have no problem with that.

37 games is nothing to base a career on...but it is something to come to a realization...and that realization is what you just told me in your post. It's almost as if I'm starting over

It's one thing to read the rules and know them well, but it's another to go out there and use them. That comes with time...thats the realization I'm getting.

It is true some people just aren't built for officiating. But 37 games is IMO too soon to hang 'em up. I had the advantage of working 100+ games in each of my 1st four seasons. And man did I suck in the beginning! Hell, I sucked in December too, but I got out there again and fixed my mistakes.

From your blog I see you want to improve - even at that you're ahead of many guys out there. Patience (with yourself, and your assignors.)

[Bearfanmike20]

Originally Posted by Back In The Saddle

Yeah? And...? So...? What are you trying to say? You've been lucky? Your game management skills are absolutely top-notch? You're a coach? You have rhino-thick skin? Or are you just stirring the pot?

Probably any and all of the above...

Just havn't had the opportunity yet.. thats all.. nothing more.. nothing less.

[SMEngmann]

Originally Posted by NM_Ref

lol...want to hear something funny? My assignor...the one that gave me the lecture ended up throwing out the home coach. And talking to people at the game, they did it cause he "talked to much." I can't get enough of it...funny stuff...

This might be funny, but I still don't think the position that you're taking will be productive for you in your career. You're setting yourself up to be one of those "politics" guys by not re-evaluating the situation and essentially calling the assignor a hypocrite. What happened in his game has absolutely no bearing on your game.

In regards to the other posters, I agree that the assignor and the other V ref did not handle the situation appropriately in regard to the OP. I would stop short of saying that the OP was thrown under the bus. Taken at face value, the assignor saw the entire incident, saw the non verbal communication that took place that we can't see and evidently made a judgement that the coach should not have been thrown. That's a judgement that the OP should learn from or try to learn from and self-evaluate to determine whether he could have done something differently. Continually defending a position without being open to criticism leaves no room for growth.

That being said, I don't believe that this situation should have any bearing on your future assignments, particularly if taken as a learning experience. Pulling games would amount to you being, in a way, thrown under a bus. The assignor needs to realize that it's a learning process in terms of dealing with these situations and should actively engage himself in helping you. Doing nothing but criticize and pull assignments would be throwing your career under the bus.

[Mark Padgett]

Originally Posted by LDUB

So what is an acceptable number of technical fouls for 37 games?

However many are warranted. No more, no less.

[Mark Dexter]

Originally Posted by MadCityRef

AP,
9 techs in 37 games is not good.

In my first 37 games, I probably had about 40 technicals. I was a freshman working intramurals, and I wasn't taking cr*p from anyone - be they drunken fraternity brothers or grad students.

Had these 9 Ts come in varsity games, I might wonder about the OP. For middle school, frosh/JV type games, he seems right on the mark.

Also, I think it's better to have a rookie who calls too many Ts than one who never penalizes unsporting behavior at all.

[Rich]

Originally Posted by Bearfanmike20

I still have yet to call a T in 35+ games now.

Please don't turn into one of these guys who counts the days/games/years between technicals and uses that as a measure of officiating quality.