"That's a coaching issue."

Someone here recommended this reply when a coach complains about the inequality of foul calls. I like the sounds of this comment. It is not a wise-crack, it is short, and it gets the point across. So I have worked on remembering it so I could use it at the crucial moment.

And all my effort payed off Friday night, when I had the chance to use it. Girls JV, early in the fourth quarter, Team A ahead by 10. Coach B gets time out, asst coach A huddles girls, Head coach A comes to me and says, "Look at the fouls, we've got 9, they've got only 4." Here's my big chance!!! I say very straight, no sarcasm, no accusation, "Coach, that's a coaching issue." Unfortunately, I said it a tad too loud (although I didn't try to!). Some of the Team A dads, who apparently were feeling adolescent, started laughing at Coach A, "A coaching issue! Ha, she got you there, coach!!" "Oooo, coach what are you going to do about that?" "Hey, coach, you've got issues!"

I thought, "Dog-doo-doo!!" and sure enough, he was steamed at me and let me know for the rest of the game. Doggone it!! I don't think I'll ever get the hang of this coach management thing...

Try this Davism next time, Juulie:

Howler Monkey: Look at the fouls. We've got nine and they've got only four.

You: There's a simple explanation for that. Your team has fouled nine times and their team has fouled four times. You see, we match the foul count to the number of times a team has fouled. For instance, if your team had fouled ten times instead of only nine, then the foul count would be ten to four, instead of nine to four. It works the same way on the score. The score count is reflective of the number of points each team has scored. I know that sometimes that's a difficult concept to grasp, but I've tried to explain it plainly.

See, coach. That's how it works. I hope that clears it up for you. If there's anything else you don't understand, just ask. I'll be just as helpful.

Then puke on his shoes.

Mark that is funny but i don't think the coach would let you get all that out. How about, coach your players are too fast for the other team to foul.

Nicely done! I would say that if the kids in the audience
(the dads) laughed at your response they also heard the
coach's comment to you. He was trying to show you up,
you one-upped him, I bet you a dollar he'll never do that
again. At least to you.

Hey - when I talk, coaches listen - kind of like the old E.F. Hutton commercials.

However, if you think that was too long, try this:

Howler Monkey: Look at the fouls. We've got nine and they've got only four.

You: Coach, you're wrong. You've got ten. WHACK!

comeon mark, you are making me laugh. :) Why don't you just say "Whack".

Because the way I signal it, it's ALL CAPS, baby!

That is why I love 3 Person. You can always get a chance to tell a coach what you need to and no one knows what you said but the coach and yourself. In 2 Person, it is very difficult to even get the chance without making a big scene or letting everyone in the gym know that you are putting them in there place. And better yet, you can say more and explain more so the coaches can shut up.

Peace

kinder and gentler
 

Rut,
No doubt about it. It's a lot easier to work things out with a 3-man.

What's with the signature line? You on Meds?

mick

Re: kinder and gentler
 

Oh man, you just crack me up!

Re: kinder and gentler
 

[QUOTE]Originally posted by mick

Quote:

What's with the signature line? You on Meds? mick

Seriously, I think it's just a reflection of the more thoughtful, restrained Rut (which I happen to like very much, personally) that we've seen in the past several months.

On the other hand. . .ROFLMAO!! :D

Chuck

Re: Re: kinder and gentler
 

[QUOTE]Originally posted by ChuckElias

Quote:

Originally posted by mick Quote: What's with the signature line? You on Meds? mick Seriously, I think it's just a reflection of the more thoughtful, restrained Rut (which I happen to like very much, personally) that we've seen in the past several months. On the other hand. . .ROFLMAO!! :D Chuck

Ah, it's just a matter of time until his sig reads:


Take one game at a time, one day at a time and one moment at a time. Your days will be a lot happier once you
realize that I am right and I don't give a d@mn what
you think!


Just bustin' on ya Jeff! It's all in fun! (Hey, does he
look mad?) :D

For The record- It was me who suggested this response . I have used it successfully for 40 years!
Pistol

Mark, I like it, but you are correct, it is a difficult concept for a coach to grasp. Coaches still cannot grasp the concept that officials do not care who wins and who loses the game. If coaches were smart to grasp this concept they would be officiating instead of coaching so they would not have to worry who wins and who loses.

My response to a coach's comments about team foul totals is this: Tell you players not to foul.

Re: kinder and gentler
 

[QUOTE]Originally posted by mick

Quote:

Rut, No doubt about it. It's a lot easier to work things out with a 3-man. What's with the signature line? You on Meds? mick

No Mick, just a way to remind myself that you take each moment as it comes. Do not worry about the past, and definitely do not worry about the future.

Peace