sharing a story

[crew]

tonite in my game i was working a team i have had many times before with a coach that is very volatile. before the game my 3rd partner had to bail because his wife had just had a baby. we were able to pick up a great ref that had the night night off. the coach told me before the game he did not particularly like the add on official. this statement is fine by me. during pregame i tell my partners what was said just to give warning for potential hazards. 2 min. into the game i am lead table side and call a shooting foul on a drive to the hole. the coach wanted a travel that he said occurred before the foul. (we used the pro switches tonite) i am now trail table and the coach is asking about the play and i apologize for not seeing the travel and assured him that my partner would have called it if he had seen it as well. then he points at my partner and says, "that fu[king a$$hole aint worth sh1t." it took me about 2 sec to process the statement, it took me by surprise. i gave him a very hurt look and a very loud tech. i tooted real loud and pointed right in right at him from about 5 ft away and reported to the table. i wanted to make the statement very clear that what he said was unexceptable.

this may have been a poor way to handle this situation but i feel good for defending my partner.

to add on he and i usually talk to each other during the game about plays or he would jokeingly curse me or tell me that we took the game from the other team when he was winning by 20 or more with seconds left to play. these are acceptable to me when i know he was not serious. i am afraid that tonites situation has hurt our raport during games. i have him on the road tommorrow nite(fri) and will post the exchange that we have together sunday.

[RecRef]

Originally posted by crew
then he points at my partner and says, "that fu[king a$$hole aint worth sh1t."

Just woundering, where do you draw the line on a flagrant T?

To me this has crossed over.

[Brian Watson]

Better queston is is it a small area? I try to limit my exposure to team, especially twice in the same week. I know it happens, and is unavoidable sometimes. I just hope you both have a short memory.

[Bart Tyson]

good job, if he is any kind respectable coach, he won't give you any problems. If he is not, then be prepared to give him a T. I have found coaches give you more respect if you take care of business. I don't like to give T's to visiting coaches so sometimes i give a little more slack to the visiting coach.

[BBarnaky]

I would make sure to inform the supervisor of the situation and make sure he knows your seeing him again within the same week.
If I were sent in there again, I would go in with the same attitude, that nothing happened, and if he mentions it, I would say this is a new game and a new day, the slate has been wiped clean.
Good luck this weekend. Coaches are getting tired and the season is getting long. Be prepared for this to start happening more, especially as we get into late February conference play with teams that are at the bottom of the league and are frustrated.
More importantly, understand the philopsophies of the supervisor your working for!! (ie will he support you or will he "ride the fence" in fear of losing the league, or will he side with the coaches??)

Know your surroundings. Good luck.

[Dan_ref]

Originally posted by crew
tonite in my game i was working a team i have had many times before with a coach that is very volatile. before the game my 3rd partner had to bail because his wife had just had a baby. we were able to pick up a great ref that had the night night off. the coach told me before the game he did not particularly like the add on official. this statement is fine by me. during pregame i tell my partners what was said just to give warning for potential hazards. 2 min. into the game i am lead table side and call a shooting foul on a drive to the hole. the coach wanted a travel that he said occurred before the foul. (we used the pro switches tonite) i am now trail table and the coach is asking about the play and i apologize for not seeing the travel and assured him that my partner would have called it if he had seen it as well. then he points at my partner and says, "that fu[king a$$hole aint worth sh1t." it took me about 2 sec to process the statement, it took me by surprise. i gave him a very hurt look and a very loud tech. i tooted real loud and pointed right in right at him from about 5 ft away and reported to the table. i wanted to make the statement very clear that what he said was unexceptable.

this may have been a poor way to handle this situation but i feel good for defending my partner.

to add on he and i usually talk to each other during the game about plays or he would jokeingly curse me or tell me that we took the game from the other team when he was winning by 20 or more with seconds left to play. these are acceptable to me when i know he was not serious. i am afraid that tonites situation has hurt our raport during games. i have him on the road tommorrow nite(fri) and will post the exchange that we have together sunday.

OK, at the risk of getting blasted, how do you know he
wasn't joking this time? Would you have not T'ed him
if he had not said anything to you about your partner
before the game? It sounds like you do have a good
rapport with this coach, maybe a little to good if he
felt comfortable saying that to you. Maybe the thing to do
is to say something like "I couldn't let that comment go"
during handshakes tonight before the game. Or maybe you
should just start treating him as just another @sshole
coach, there are some out there you know . Let us know
what happens.

[JRutledge]

Why are you using NBA switching? If you did what you were suppose to do according to the normal mechanics, you would have never had to hear what he said. At least at the time he said it.

Understand that the NBA does things much different because all the parties are professionals and have been in the game for a very long time. And they will have to see those officials several times a year more than likely. And it is to their benefit to treat each other as professionals or there is going to be a constant problem. That is why the NF and College both have officials going away from the table. Even with an experienced official, you cause yourself more problems by trying to explain things right after a foul. At least if he has displeasure with your call, he has to yell it at you. Then when you give him a T the whole gym knows why. I might be harping on this, but I think the use of that mechanic caused the problem, not necessarily what he said. Now more than likely, you have to explain what he did instead of it being clear to others what he said. And even if you give him a T and it is justified, it might seem personal to him and others that observe the events. Not unless he was very annimated about what he felt about your partner.

Peace

[ChuckElias]

Originally posted by JRutledge
Why are you using NBA switching? If you did what you were suppose to do according to the normal mechanics, you would have never had to hear what he said. At least at the time he said it.

My guess, Rut, is that tony's working a pro league. Or at least, a pro-am league. That's why his crew was using the pro mechanics. That's also why he has the same coach on the road so soon after having him last night. Just my guess, but I think it would explain your question.

Chuck

[JRutledge]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by ChuckElias

My guess, Rut, is that tony's working a pro league. Or at least, a pro-am league. That's why his crew was using the pro mechanics. That's also why he has the same coach on the road so soon after having him last night. Just my guess, but I think it would explain your question.

Chuck

Well that does make a difference, but he never stated the level and that would be guessing by both of us.

And having the same coach back to back has happen to me twice this year. And it had nothing to do with a Pro-Am League of any kind. That just happens sometimes and there is not a whole hell of a lot you can do about it. Unless you only work for one assignor and all your games and scheduling come from that person alone. But if you get games from many different sources, you might see a team 5 times like I will be seeing before the year is out. It just happen that way. I did not know who everyone was playing when I accepted the games.

Peace

[zebraman]

Sounds like a pretty cut-and-dried technical to me..why are you even doubting yourself in the slightest?

As far as his pre-game comments about the other ref, my response would have been, "I've worked with him before and he does a nice job."

As one of the others stated, sounds like maybe you have a fairly close relationship w/ this coach and need to let him know that it's all business once you step on the floor.

Z

[bluezebra]

"then he points at my partner and says, "that fu[king a$$hole aint worth sh1t."

Why did you let this foul-mouthed jerk remain in the game? You didn't defend your partner by giving just a T.

Bob

[crew]

Originally posted by bluezebra
"then he points at my partner and says, "that fu[king a$$hole aint worth sh1t."

Why did you let this foul-mouthed jerk remain in the game? You didn't defend your partner by giving just a T.

Bob

im not going to eject a coach for that alone. i whacked him and told my partners what had happened. the coach had no rope for the rest of the night, and he knew it. his assistant took over from that point.

in pregame i discuss with my partners if we tech a coach we do not speak to him on any level for the next 4 or five game min. last night we did not speak to him for the remainder of the game. 1-9 was thrown out the window, he had used those babies up.

[Mark Dexter]

Originally posted by crew

in pregame i discuss with my partners if we tech a coach we do not speak to him on any level for the next 4 or five game min. last night we did not speak to him for the remainder of the game. 1-9 was thrown out the window, he had used those babies up.

What do you mean by 1-9 was thrown out the window?

[BBarnaky]

1 being ignore the problem totally...10 being Technical Foul. 2 through 9 are creations that you use to help bring a coach back to the adult world from the "child world" (i.e. to a diffuse a coach).....certain responses being polite and nice, being stern with a voice, a scowl, the stop sign for a warning, these types of responses are 2 through 9.

[crew]

Originally posted by Mark Dexter
[/B]

What do you mean by 1-9 was thrown out the window?
[/B][/QUOTE]

when dealing with technical foul type situations it is commonly referred to as a 1-10 situation. where 1 you ignore what has been said and 10 as a technical. which means 2-9 skills are the levels/ways of difusing a situation withiut ignoring and without tech'ing. 2-9 skills of address do not come naturally to me, therefor i have to try to identify the proper way to handle situations that do not require a tech but do require attention.

let me try to break this down as well as i can.
in the posted situation 1-10 could be broken down as follows.
1. ignore what is said.
2-8. address the situation
9. warn the coach
10. technical foul.
this coach will not be ignored nor warned the rest of the game, if he gets out of line he is done. he has lost all priveledges of address by provoking me to go straight to the tech. keep in mind this is a rare situation where as a crew we will no longer deal with his antics.
i have also had to whack a coach this early in a game but the coach did not burn his ability to talk to us through out the game.

i will try to post a full 2-9 breakdown in the near future. hope this explains what i meant.