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-   -   Communication Skills to Coaches & Players. (https://forum.officiating.com/basketball/27931-communication-skills-coaches-players.html)

Jurassic Referee Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:05pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nate1224hoops
1) I am a coach now (official before) and I love when official are polite, courteous, and act like human beings. Talking with players and coaches is IMO an excellent way to establish relationships. A coach will be much less likely to yell and scream at you if you have a rapport with him/her. My question to you is this....HOW CAN IT HURT?? I don't think anyone mentioned sucking up, only you. Big difference between sucking up and conversation. I agree completely....you do need to do your job well, but where does it say that conversation with player/coaches is or isn't part of your job. Again you refer to things not mentioned before "cheerleading." Saying "great job" or "nice hustle" isn't cheerleading. From the sound of things your the ref that every coach and player hates see come through the gym doors on game night. My guess is that your favorite comment is "Coach, you coach and I'll ref."

Nate, good luck with the coach's gig. From your previous posts here, you've certainly made the right choice in giving up officiating. Our avocation obviously wasn't meant for you.

As usual, you don't have a clue what the point being made was. Lemme spell it out for you:
1) Communication is good.
2) Initiating conversations just to cheerlead and to suck around is bad.
3) Throwing your partners under the bus while trying to be Mr. Nice Guy is horrible.

You can be polite, courteous and act like a human being without sticking your nose in where it doesn't belong.

And yes, there is a big difference between sucking up and communicating. Unfortunately, imo Official 99 doesn't know the difference. It looks like you don't either, which really doesn't surprise me.

If you want to disagree with that, hey, knock yourself out.

Again, good luck with the coaching. Wise choice.

Nate1224hoops Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:14pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee
Nate, good luck with the coach's gig. From your previous posts here, you've certainly made the right choice in giving up officiating. Our avocation obviously wasn't meant for you.

As usual, you don't have a clue what the point being made was. Lemme spell it out for you:
1) Communication is good.
2) Initiating conversations just to cheerlead and to suck around is bad.
3) Throwing your partners under the bus while trying to be Mr. Nice Guy is horrible.

You can be polite, courteous and act like a human being without sticking your nose in where it doesn't belong.

And yes, there is a big difference between sucking up and communicating. Unfortunately, imo Official 99 doesn't know the difference. It looks like you don't either, which really doesn't surprise me.

If you want to disagree with that, hey, knock yourself out.

Again, good luck with the coaching. Wise choice.

JR you continue to show all our members just what a joke you are. Conversation is good. Show me where I said that it isn't. Sucking up..you are the JA who used those words, no one else. Cheerleading, again you and only you. Encouragement yes, cheerleading no. I am positive you know the difference between sucking up and communicating, b/c I am sure you do a lot of SUCKING.
YOU KEEP PULLING THINGS OUT YOUR EAR. Who said anything about sticking your nose where it doesn't belong. Carrying on conversation, at the appropriate time, with players or coaches is only going to gain you their respect. Again, you wouldn't know anything about that. All you know how to do is put other people down.

The change of hobby comes b/c of a holes like you. I got tired of working with them. It's people like you who give the rest of these guys here a bad name.

Dan_ref Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:20pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nate1224hoops
JR you continue to show all our members just what a joke you are. Conversation is good. Show me where I said that it isn't. Sucking up..you are the JA who used those words, no one else. Cheerleading, again you and only you. Encouragement yes, cheerleading no. I am positive you know the difference between sucking up and communicating, b/c I am sure you do a lot of SUCKING.
YOU KEEP PULLING THINGS OUT YOUR EAR. Who said anything about sticking your nose where it doesn't belong. Carrying on conversation, at the appropriate time, with players or coaches is only going to gain you their respect. Again, you wouldn't know anything about that. All you know how to do is put other people down.

The change of hobby comes b/c of a holes like you. I got tired of working with them. It's people like you who give the rest of these guys here a bad name.

I just knew there was a reason.

btw, Nate...hitting the cap lock key is usually a good sign you're starting to lose focus. Just sayin. It's the internet version of slamming your beer glass down on the bar, or cutting off that a-hole on the highway.

Not that you-know-who aint an a-hole. Keep hammering away, this is fun!

:D

Nate1224hoops Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:25pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Official99
First of all, I never said I suck up to the players or the coaches.

Second of all, I am not a cheerleader, I am a referee!

Thirdly, I never said we blow our whistles for them doing something right.

Did you read anything I wrote? The benefit of talking to the players during the game (that I have found) is when I do make that call that they may disagree with me on, they don't go overboard in their displeasure. In fact, they usually come up and talk to me - they ask "why did you make that call?" or "why didn't I get that call?" - rather than yelling.

I am not sure what level games you referee, but I have worked my way up from the youth level to college with the same philosophy. I have traveled as far away as Las Vegas for games (from NH that is a long ways). I have done games in front of Lute Olson among many other great coaches. My philosophy works and that's all that matters. Thanks for disagreeing with me.

Official99, this is a great message board. Nearly everyone in here will lend a helping line or two. Most here will tell you when you do/did something wrong and tell you how to improve. Some, not mentioning names (juraassic), will only tell you how stupid you are and NOT fail to mention their perfect ways. Some peoples screenname will give it away...JURASSSSic Ref...that tells you all you need to know right there.
Keep your head up. This is a great place to share your ideas.

JRutledge Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:29pm

http://www.philadelphiapopcorn.com/i...ontdisplay.jpg

Peace

Nate1224hoops Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:29pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dan_ref
I just knew there was a reason.

btw, Nate...hitting the cap lock key is usually a good sign you're starting to lose focus. Just sayin. It's the internet version of slamming your beer glass down on the bar, or cutting off that a-hole on the highway.

Not that you-know-who aint an a-hole. Keep hammering away, this is fun!

:D

I'm sure you did Dan. Btw, Dan...it could mean that I would like to put an emphasis on the sentence or it could be that I would like to slam my beer glass!!

Jurassic Referee Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:33pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nate1224hoops
Official99, this is a great message board. Nearly everyone in here will lend a helping line or two. Most here will tell you when you do/did something wrong and tell you how to improve. Some, not mentioning names (juraassic), will only tell you how stupid you are and NOT fail to mention their perfect ways. Some peoples screenname will give it away...JURASSSSic Ref...that tells you all you need to know right there.
Keep your head up. This is a great place to share your ideas.

:D

Again, good luck coaching, Nate. Wise choice. Seriously.

Dan_ref Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:37pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nate1224hoops
I'm sure you did Dan. Btw, Dan...it could mean that I would like to put an emphasis on the sentence or it could be that I would like to slam my beer glass!!

Don't take that as meaningless criticism...it's sorta like me telling you to keep your left hand up cause he's got a nasty right hook.

You're doing a great job, now get back in there!

Jurassic Referee Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:38pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nate1224hoops
1)JR you continue to show all our members just what a joke you are.

2)..you are the JA

3)I am sure you know the difference between sucking up and communicating, b/c I am sure you do a lot of SUCKING.

4) The change of hobby comes b/c of a holes like you.

Tsk, tsk, tsk........

Potty mouth.

Nate1224hoops Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:41pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jurassic Referee
:D

Again, good luck coaching, Nate. Wise choice. Seriously.

Thanks a lot Juraaassssic. I think it was a great opportunity also. Seriously, cut the new guys a break. Present you thoughtful, objective material in a nicer way. Kindness really does go a long way. And good luck with your upcoming season as well. As I am sure you will drive many partners, coaches, players, and fans nuts with you JURASSIC OFFICIATING.

Nate1224hoops Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:42pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dan_ref
Don't take that as meaningless criticism...it's sorta like me telling you to keep your left hand up cause he's got a nasty right hook.

You're doing a great job, now get back in there!

Or he maybe he's got a glass jaw!!!

Dan_ref Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:44pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nate1224hoops
Or he maybe he's got a glass jaw!!!

We'll never know unless you actually hit it!

Now get back in there & let him have it!

M&M Guy Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:45pm

Aw, geesh, it's starting to get nice again.

Keep egging him on, Dan - I was getting hungry for some more popcorn...

:D

JRutledge Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:48pm

http://www.philadelphiapopcorn.com/i...ontdisplay.jpg

Here you go. :D

Peace

Dan_ref Thu Aug 24, 2006 01:49pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by M&M Guy
Aw, geesh, it's starting to get nice again.

Keep egging him on, Dan - I was getting hungry for some more popcorn...

:D

Looks like it's just a little shouting & a few half-hearted shoves.

I hate when that happens...

:(


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