What should you do about bad parenting?

[Dan_ref]

Seriously Folks,

The parents where I live have gotten to the point where it's really, really bad. Is there anything an official can do about it or do we just have to learn to tolerate it?

I know parents are people too, and it's a tough job, and they aint getting paid. We officials are working for maybe $10, 20 or in some areas a whopping $30 to $40 per summer game. This past AAU season, it just seemed like the parenting was worse than ever. So far, summer league has been no better.

I'll never forget the game where the parents on the endlines screamed their fool heads off for fouls in the first half, then in the second half scream even louder when you call a foul. Is it too much to ask these parents to expect games be called fairly and not expect every single call to go their way?

One of my main pet peeves is the parent who screams at his teenaged kid that he wasn't being aggressive enough. "Knock him on his azz! Show him what you're made of!!" Then there's the parents that ridicule a teenager because he blew an easy layup, or missed everything on a free throw. I know they're only having fun, but, I mean, come on, try at least to have SOME perpective.

Maybe it's not as wide spread everywhere as it is in my area, but it sure is bad here. Is it because we're not adequately policing and evaluating parents?

What can officials do about it? What is the right approach?

[KenThree]

Thank you. Couldn't have said it better

[JRutledge]

This is one of the funniest posts I have seen in a long time.

I needed that laugh.

Peace

[rainmaker]

I agree that it's gotten worse in the last couple of years. Around here it seems like it is worse in some leagues than others, worse in some tournaments than others.

Could you start throwing some of them out? maybe at least move them off the endline, and up into the stands?

You might try talking to them ahead of time, or having coaches do it. In some of our summer leagues, they've started having the coaches do more to control the parents. It's helped quite a bit. But you've got to have game management on your side to pull it off.

Oh, wait, this wasn't a serious post? you were just jabbing at someone who complained about the reffing... okay so there's some egg on my face.

[REFVA]

This is funny,

I have to tell a funny story that happened last night.

I did a championship AAU summer league game. On one side of the court I kept hearing 3 second, 3 seconds 3 seconds. I thought i was loosing my eyesight. Oddly enough at half time I had an opportunity to ask the parents who is yelling 3 seconds I shouldn't have asked but I needed to just to clear my head. A woman turns and said me. I explained what 3 seconds was. She replied thanks, and then she was honest to say. "this is the only call I know".

Which I tend to believe that 90% of the parents don't have a hell of beans knowledge of any rule of basketball.

[tjones1]

It's extremely bad and it isn't getting any better. It's sad, to say the least. As for summer ball goes, I just don't take it. For the most part in our area we are getting paid $15 per game if not nothing. So it doesn't take too much for me to show them the door.

This summer our association was working a small two-day camp. The officials weren't getting paid anything directly, however there was a small amount of money going to the association's funds. On a floor I wasn't working on, the parents got so bad that the officials just said they had enough and called it a night. Pretty funny.

I don't know, maybe in today's society it's "cool" to look like an idiot and be ejected from a sports contest.

[refnrev]

Originally Posted by JRutledge

This is one of the funniest posts I have seen in a long time.

I needed that laugh.

Peace

__________________________
Actually, Rut, i have to disagree with you. I think it's one of the saddest because it is so true!

[26 Year Gap]

I did notice that smurf [the poor man's Barney] did not reply in his thread, so he must me all set now.

[Mregor]

Originally Posted by Dan_ref

Seriously Folks,

What can officials do about it? What is the right approach?

Quit working those games.

Mregor

[kiwiref]

I think that the problem is not going to get any better in the future. Just ignoring the idiots will work to a certain extent, but eventually they will see the lack of action from the officials as a tacit approval for their behaviour, and things will start getting worse. This means that the very nature of how we manage the game will have to be slightly modified.
Here's what I would like to suggest. Establish a code of conduct for for parents, and make it very clear that breaches will result in eviction from the venue. Second, make the home team responsible for enforcing the rules. Any breach that is not being dealt with appropriately will lead to forfeit of the game at the discretion of the referees, and a possible financial fine later on. Yes, this would mean that the home team will have to organise security arrangements to be able to deal with idiots. But that's a small price to pay compared to the cost of an increased number of referees refusing to work certain areas/associations/schools etc. Also, we are already struggling to recruit new referees in many sports because young people do not want to put up with the abuse they are witnessing. So, I say time to clear up.

[REFVA]

Here's what I would like to suggest. Establish a code of conduct for for parents, and make it very clear that breaches will result in eviction from the venue. Second, make the home team responsible for enforcing the rules. Any breach that is not being dealt with appropriately will lead to forfeit of the game at the discretion of the referees, and a possible financial fine later on. Yes, this would mean that the home team will have to organise security arrangements to be able to deal with idiots. But that's a small price to pay compared to the cost of an increased number of referees refusing to work certain areas/associations/schools etc. Also, we are already struggling to recruit new referees in many sports because young people do not want to put up with the abuse they are witnessing. So, I say time to clear up.

Amen! How do we officials enforce to get that in place

[dave30]

I have had a kid apologize to me for the actions of his Dad. That was pretty cool.

[Back In The Saddle]

Originally Posted by dave30

I have had a kid apologize to me for the actions of his Dad. That was pretty cool.

I've had that too.