How to talk to a referee

[coachgbert]

I come here as a coach to tell everyone that I absolutely control the game and how it's played by my girls. They respond directly to my influence, how I respond to them and the officials and the manner in which I give directions. I have never had an official "control" the game. The coaches control the game. If I pump up my girls to play aggressively they will play aggressively. If I pump up my 4th graders they will foul more. My 8th grade AAU select team has a better understanding of what MY definition of aggressive is and how to accomplish it out on the court. Do they know what they can get away with and what they can't? Usually. I have also taught them to be aware of what is being called early in the game.

The way the players respond on the court and how they play is the direct responsibility of the coach. I'm not being some suck up coach here either, trying to get on the good side of the officials. I know the limitations and the abilities of each of my players. I know who fouls based on lack of talent and skill and who fouls because they were just being stupid that moment. My 8th graders don't "reach", my 4th graders reach constantly, always and do it even when I tell them to play defense by moving their body, not using their hands. My 8th graders don't reach because they have learned the art of footwork and how to move, my 4th graders chase, a lot.

This is a sore point of mine. I am so tired of listening to other coaches and parents, even ones on my own team, harp about lack of calls, too many calls, etc. Last night I had to endure the calls of parents to "call it both ways" at least a hundred times. My girls just fouled yesterday. They fouled on offense and on defense. The other team did too. Both teams were hyper, aggressive and out of control. Both teams had fouls. I took out one of my players when she wouldn't stop acting like we were playing football. She was surprised. Did she foul on purpose? No, of course not, but she did realize what I wanted after I took her out and explained you can't hug the other team.

I'll get off my coaching soap box now. I small vent to be sure, but at least I had a captive audience! Now if I could only convince my parents that the little girl on the other team did not bite little Sally on purpose I will have achieved a miracle.

Thanks for listening to a coach.

Coach Gbert